Single Sexuality

Sharon Jayson in her March 22, 2012, usatoday.com article, "Nearly 40% of women today have never been married" reports, "The data, out today from the National Center for Health Statistics, are based on 22,682 in-person interviews from 2006 to 2010 with men and women (not couples) ages 15 to 44. Among the 12,279 women studied, the percentage of never-marrieds rose to 38% from 33% in 1995.

The highest percentage of women who have never married was among blacks (55%), followed by U.S.-born Hispanics (49%), Asians (39%) and whites (34%)."

Most adults in America have had sex outside of marriage. Sex outside of marriage can feel pretty good, but after a while some wonder maybe marriage is better?

Most Americans have also probably heard, "Thou shalt not commit adultery" (Exodus 20:14 King James Version Bible).

Living beyond or beneath the Bible has negative consequences. We are harmed and even die physically, intellectually, emotionally and spiritually whenever we don't live in the ways of the Word. Moses was close to God. He spoke face-to-face with God. Moses lived in his right mind and in full use of his body right up until his death at 120. He would have lived longer, if he had not disobeyed God in striking the Rock.

Disobedience is deadly. Obedience to God opens opportunities for eminent, enjoyable living. Read my article, "Heart Disease, Depression and Christianity."

God talks about sex and sexuality in the Bible openly, clearly, directly, truthfully and lovingly. Many people globally are not experiencing God's best in sexuality and sex due to sexual sin. Read my article, "Sexual Dissatisfaction."

Leaving the sin of partner-sex outside of marriage is tough and may take a long time. For me it took a number of years and did not happen until I had a child while single. Sadly, like many others both non-Christian and Christian, I was having partner-sex outside of marriage.

Has anyone found the negative side of single parenting to be like being married without the benefits?

A Rosa Heyman Redbook "25 reasons why married sex is better" article says about married people, "By now, you've had a lot of sex together. Part of the fun of having such a long history is that you can talk about your favorite times and do your best to recreate the heat!"

All the arguments against premarital sex based on a desire to avoid HIV and Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs) and to use contraception didn't do much for me and many others. These things seem easily managable. God used relationship training to give me revelation on the destructive nature of sin and the true love of God.

Children have a positive influence on our relationship with God. Genesis 5:22 Amplified Bible says, "Enoch walked [in habitual fellowship] with God after the birth of Methuselah 300 years and had other sons and daughters."

Por favor me ayude. (Please help me.) What has God taught you about partner sex? 

While we do a lot of things that God does not approve of, God still loves all people all the time.

God loves all kinds of singles: singles who have never been married, singles with children, divorced people, singles without children, singles living in various types of non-married-sexual relationships, singles who are victorious over the gay lifestyle, singles who are not victorious over the gay lifestyle. Are there other types of singles?

Many singles enjoy being single. Many singles would also like to be married.

What are your favorite love stories?

Marriage is for multiple types of people. In the movie, My Name Is Khan, Rizvan has Asperger's Syndrome, which is a form of autism. He is rejected at school because his autism behavior is not understood or accepted, so his mom finds another way to educate him. When his mom dies, Rizvan moves from India to San Francisco, California, to live with his brother, Zakir. Zakir gets him a job as a salesman for Mehnaz Herbal Beauty Products. Through his job Rizvan meets Mandira. Eventually Rizvan and Mandira marry.

A lot of the tension in My Name Is Khan revolves around people's fear and ignorance of autism and differences in people. The tension in My Name Is Khan is like the mommy wars in American culture.

Sometimes in American culture we forget about loving people extravagantly and go to war over our misfortunes, challenges and differences. Whether we are mothers whose full-time work is to raise children like Pauletta Washington (wife of actor Denzel Washington) or mothers who are also employees, business owners, non-profit employees and non-profit owners like Naomi Zacharias of Wellspring International, Joyce Meyer of Joyce Meyer Ministries or Cookie Lee of Cookie Lee Jewelry, we all have God-given purpose and roles in life. And this is also true for women who are complete and successful as singles without children like the first African-American female U.S. secretary of state, Condolezza Rice, who is currently a CBS News contributor. Not every woman wants to say, "Sou casada". ("I am married.") Read my article, "Something Horrible Happened?"

We don't need a big name for God to care about us and call us into ministry. Ministry is for all people including divorced people. Being widowed or divorced does not have to mean we are done living.

Who are some non-famous people doing good singles and/or married ministry?

No state of being can separate us from the love of God. God chooses all kinds of people to love, and His love is eternal. The Apostle Paul writes in Romans 8:38-39 Amplified Bible, "For I am persuaded beyond doubt (am sure) that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities, nor things impending and threatening nor things to come, nor powers, Nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."