La Familia

What would you do for love? Would you go to prison? Calvin Fairbank and Delia Webster were teachers and abolitionists who helped Lewis Hayden, Hayden's wife, Harriet, and the Hayden's son escape from slavery.

The Hayden's made it safely from Kentucky to Ohio then to Canada. Fairbank and Webster were arrested and charged with slave stealing. Galatians 5:13-14 Amplified Bible says, "For you, brethren, were [indeed] called to freedom; only [do not let your] freedom be an incentive to your flesh and an opportunity or excuse [for selfishness], but through love you should serve one another. For the whole Law [concerning human relationships] is complied with in the one precept, You shall love your neighbor as [you do] yourself."

Calvin Fairbank, who was also a minister, agreed to plead guilty if Delia Webster was allowed to  go free. Webster was freed. Fairbank was sentenced to 15 years in prison.

Black people look different from white people. The Haydens, Fairbank and Webster prove difference can be dynamic instead of a reason for hatred and abuse.

Rafael, my son who has autism, and I live in Virginia which is a state next to the state of Maryland. Even though slavery has been abolished in the United States, and Rafael, I and other African Americans enjoy our freedom, racial problems still exist in America along with conflict among all kinds of people. In Frederick, Maryland, a young man, Robert Ethan Saylor, was killed in a movie theater in January 2013 because people didn't understand someone with Down Syndrome.

God made each person different. No two people not even twins and other multiples have the same finger prints, eye prints or scent. God made us different on purpose. God even made some people with disabilities. Exodus 4:11 Contemporary English Version Bible says, "But the Lord answered, “Who makes people able to speak or makes them deaf or unable to speak? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Don’t you know that I am the one who does these things?"

Yellow (huang) was a color reserved for the Chinese Emperor and members of the imperial family. The emperor had to grant permission for other people to wear it.

Partiality puts up barriers to treating people right. James, a brother of Jesus Christ and an apostle, writes in the book of James Complete Jewish Bible, "My brothers, practice the faith of our Lord Yeshua, the glorious Messiah, without showing favoritism. Suppose a man comes into your synagogue wearing gold rings and fancy clothes, and also a poor man comes in dressed in rags. If you show more respect to the man wearing the fancy clothes and say to him, “Have this good seat here,” while to the poor man you say, “You, stand over there,” or, “Sit down on the floor by my feet,” then aren’t you creating distinctions among yourselves, and haven’t you made yourselves into judges with evil motives?"

Welcome and accept whoever wants to receive Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord and to join la familia de Dios (the family of God) this Good Friday or any other day. La familia helps each other.

Lewis Hayden raised $650.00 which through a chain of other players helped free Calvin Fairbank from prison within four years.

Awesome Aging

God made Church discipline to be appropriate at times. God did not design Church discipline to be eternal. God through the Apostle Paul asked the Corinthian Church to ask a man who had sexual relations with his father's wife to leave the Church (1 Corinthians 5.) Later Paul encouraged the Church to welcome him back into their group. 

The Apostle Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 2:5-8 Amplified Bible, "But if someone [the one among you who committed incest] has caused [all this] grief and pain, he has caused it not to me, but in some measure, not to put it too severely, [he has distressed] all of you. For such a one this censure by the majority [which he has received is] sufficient [punishment]. So [instead of further rebuke, now] you should rather turn and [graciously] forgive and comfort and encourage [him], to keep him from being overwhelmed by excessive sorrow and despair. I therefore beg you to reinstate him in your affections and assure him of your love for him"

Fashion Designer John Galliano was dismissed in 2011 from the house of Dior after a drunken party in a Parisian cafe that included him saying, "I love Hitler," says The New York Times in the February 14, 2013, article "Tentative Step By Fallen Star To Come Back."

Jesus Christ is for a good party with alcohol. He changed water to wine well after a lot of wine was consumed at a wedding feast in Cana of Galilee, Israel (John 2.) However, drunkenness is dumb and false joy. Ephesians 5:18 Amplified Bible says, "And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery; but ever be filled and stimulated with the [Holy] Spirit."

"Celebrare ante el Rey.(Celebrate before the King)," sings Abel Zavala in his song "Unanimes" on the album Jesus mi fiel amigo. What about churches having more praise parties with humor, good music and other celebrations of life that are fun? Read my article, "Heart Disease, Depression and Christianity."

And after a good praise party, the mood is set for much, hot and spicy marital sex for couples of all ages. Sexual love doesn't have to end when we reach a certain age. Jack, a character in the romantic comedy Don Juan DeMarco, says to Marilyn, his wife of more than 30 years, "You have very, very beautiful eyes." Marilyn comments, "Come on. You know I have to go upstairs, and um I'm going to take my calcium so my bones don't break into little pieces, my aspirin so my heart doesn't clog up, my Metamucil so I don't get colon cancer, and of course my estrogen to convince my body that I'm still 23." Jack responds, "Come here." They kiss, and marital, senior sex ensues.

Abraham also enjoyed marital, senior sex. Abraham had his first child at 86 and seven more stretching well into his 100s.

In God's eyes age is just a number not a reason to stop living a full, enjoyable life advancing God's Kingdom through relationship building.

If you are not making frequent delicious with your spouse, contact a Bible teacher, Bible counselor, Christian sex therapist and/or Christian marriage counselor. God designed sexual relations for spouses to give and to receive enjoyment from each other while strengthening their marriage. Whether one screams out in passion, silently savors sex or is somewhere in between, marital sex is made for merriment. Solomon writes in Proverbs 5 The Message Bible, "Enjoy the wife you married as a young man! Lovely as an angel, beautiful as a rose—don’t ever quit taking delight in her body."

Sex at 60 and beyond may not be the same as sex at 25, but then again it may be even better. Moses was married, and he was also in his right mind and healthy body up to death at 120. Imagine the sexual expertise and possibilities!

Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher of North Carolina have been married 85 years (86 in May 2013) and hold the Guinness World Record for the longest marriage of a living couple. Zelmyra is 101 years old. Herbert is 104 years old. They have 5 children, 10 grandchildren, 9 great-grandchildren and 1 great-great grandchild -- another good testimony against abortion and for life, legacy and immortality. Please read my article, "Big is Beautiful."

How did the Fishers stay married so long? They are Christians who are good lovers and good friends. Solomon's Shulammite wife says about Solomon in Song of Solomon 5:16 New Living Translation Bible, "His mouth is sweetness itself, he is desirable in every way. Such, O women of Jerusalem, is my lover, my friend."

Not only do married people need friends, so do singles. Fashion Designer Oscar de la Renta, who is 80 years old, and others are helping Galliano reestablish himself in the fashion business after working on his alcoholism and attitude.

The New York Times in the February 14, 2013, article "Tentative Step By Fallen Star To Come Back" reports about Galliano, "He was punished because of what he said, and I think deservedly so," Mr. Foxman said. "But if he's punished for the rest of his life, he will become an anti-Semite."" Mr. Foxman is Abraham H. Foxman, the national director of the Anti-Defamation League.

Oscar de la Renta is well past the American traditional retirement age. Jack decides not to retire and to continue his psychiatry profession. Brazilian writer Paul Coelho writes in the introduction to his book, The Alchemist, which has sold more than two million copies and been translated in 52 languages, "What is a personal calling? It is God's blessing, it is the path that God chose for you here on Earth. Whenever we do something that fills us with enthusiasm, we are following our legend." 

Age is not a barrier to following our legend. Coelho switched careers in his 40s to become a writer, and he is still writing in his 60s.

We do not have to do the same profession all of our adult life. The apostles Peter, Andrew, James and John were fishermen who became ministers.

Many people are missing their legend for multiple reasons. The ultimate reason is that they are refusing to listen to and let God lead their lives.

February 10, 2013, marked the beginning of the Chinese New Year. What about celebrating a new release of self-centeredness and embracing God's plans for our lives without any reservations?

God is also for us taking frequent breaks from the regular work routine and resting and celebrating. In the Old Testament God set-up feasts and Sabbaths that lasted sometimes more than one day. It would be good to separate Abraham Lincoln's birthday from President's Day. Lincoln issued the Emancipation Proclamation in 1863, encouraging border states to outlaw slavery, helped push through Congress the Thirteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution, which finally freed all the slaves nationwide in December 1865, led the United States through the American Civil War preserving the Union and battled periods of depression.

Black History isn't just for or by black people. No people's history is just for and by them. Collaboration has been and always will be part of the creative process of bettering the human race.

Paisa (Money) is also a necessary part of the process. People can be trained to the highest, hardworking and still broke. Bucks are needed to boost businesses and other entrepreneurial efforts off the ground. Read my article "Faith, Fear and Japanese Americans." People who were in the bottom 20 percent of income earners in their societies, but are now in the top 20 percent, please share about the financial assistance you received during your climb. Lovers are generous givers.

"I am on a mission, a mission of love," sings Donna Summer in her song, "Love is the Healer."

1 John 4:16 Amplified Bible says, "And we know (understand, recognize, are conscious of, by observation and by experience) and believe (adhere to and put faith in and rely on) the love God cherishes for us. God is love, and he who dwells and continues in love dwells and continues in God, and God dwells and continues in him."

Stern-Looking But Big-Hearted

Nothing and no one stops the love of God. This same love flowed out of Absalom Jones who was a slave of a merchant in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, into a slave named Mary King. Absalom married Mary on January 4, 1770, when he was 23.

Living in bondage is not what Absalom and Mary desired for their children. Under Pennsylvania law, children born to slaves would be slaves. Aristotle wrote that human beings are teleological, which means that we are purpose driven. So Absalom and Mary worked to earn enough money to purchase freedom. During the Revolutionary War Absalom worked until twelve or one o'clock at night to assist his wife.

But their hard work was not enough to buy freedom. So they asked everyone they could, friends, associates and strangers, for donations and loans to purchase Mary's freedom. That did it.

No one fulfills God's plan for her or his life alone. God calls all Christians to help as many people as God leads you to help. Philippians 4:5 the Message Bible says, "Celebrate God all day, every day. I mean, revel in him! Make it as clear as you can to all you meet that you’re on their side, working with them and not against them. Help them see that the Master is about to arrive. He could show up any minute!"

It would have slowed down the advance of the Kingdom of God if people who God gave them the money and resources to help Absalom and Mary purchase their family's freedom decided to keep the resources to themselves. 1 Timothy 6:17-19 the Message Bible says, "Tell those rich in this world’s wealth to quit being so full of themselves and so obsessed with money, which is here today and gone tomorrow. Tell them to go after God, who piles on all the riches we could ever manage—to do good, to be rich in helping others, to be extravagantly generous. If they do that, they’ll build a treasury that will last, gaining life that is truly life."

Hebrews 11:6 Amplified Bible says, "But without faith it is impossible to please and be satisfactory to Him. For whoever would come near to God must [necessarily] believe that God exists and that He is the rewarder of those who earnestly and diligently seek Him [out]." God rewards faith with work. After eight years by 1778 Absalom paid back the loans given to him.

Stern-looking, but big-hearted Absalom was still a slave, but he continued to work to buy a house for his family. International Christian Minister Ravi Zacharias says, "The greatest compliment I can pay my wife is to let my children know that I love her the way Jesus loved the Church."

Finally, after seven more years Absalom was able to purchase his own freedom.

Please leave an on-line comment sharing notable African-American love stories.

Lovers like Absalom and Mary are the kind of people who founded the black church in America which was very active in assisting people with various needs. They also give us examples today of how to love our spouses.

Love opens up opportunites. Absalom went on to found the St. Thomas African Episcopal Church on July 17, 1794, and he became the first black American to become an ordained priest.

Heart Disease, Depression and Christianity

Following a diagnosis of coronary-artery disease and bypass surgery it is not uncommon to slide into depression. One of the reasons for the slide into depression is a break-down in our body's communication system.

Neurotransmitters are more than 60 chemicals in the body that communicate between neurons. Depression interferes with the production and processing of neurotransmitters which impacts heart disease and other diseases like diabetes, cancer, Parkinson's disease, epilepsy, stroke and Alzheimer's.

Sometimes people consider physical health as more important than mental health. The reality is that they both need our regular attention, and failing to take good care of ourselves physically and mentally is dangerous. Many people know that heart disease can be fatal, but they may not know that so can depression. In addition to the link between hearth disease and depression, most of the 30,000 American suicides annually stem from clinical depression. "One out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you," says author Rita Mae Brown.

Help to overcome all types of illness can be found through God, the Church and living according to the Word of God. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 Amplified Bible says, "Thank [God] in everything [no matter what the circumstances may be, be thankful and give thanks], for this is the will of God for you [who are] in Christ Jesus [the Revealer and Mediator of that will]."

Disobedience to God is deadly. Obedience to God opens opportunities for eminent, enjoyable living. Neal Krause, a sociologist and public-health expert at the University of Michigan, has since 1997 conducted a study of 1,500 people. One of the study's findings is that people who maintain a mindset of gratitude for what's going right in their lives have a reduced incidence of depression.

Sometimes we do not even know that we are depressed. Michael Hyatt in his "Get Out of That Funk" article at michaelhyatt.com on February 6, 2013 lists seven questions to ask ourselves:

    "Question #1: Am I getting plenty of rest?
    Question #2: Am I exercising three to four times a week?
    Question #3: Am I eating high-energy foods?
    Question #4: Am I staying hydrated?
    Question #5: Am I getting enough sunshine?
    Question #6: Am I focusing on the positive?
    Question #7: Am I hanging out with energetic people?"

Maintaining our health requires a multifaceted approach. Maintaining our health is loving God, ourselves and other people. Love is not limited to feelings; love is actions and interactions. In addition to a relationship with God the Father, God the Son Jesus Christ and God the Holy Ghost and living based on the Bible, help to live healthy can also be found through medical professionals and support groups. The North Carolina Black Churches United for Better Health involved 50 churches with 2,500 members mixing spiritual and communal life with eating better and exercising more. This group became a national group, called the Body and Soul project, with the same objective.

Your Christian fellowship may prayerfully consider starting a health support group if it does not already have one, and/or maybe your church could hold regular praise parties playing music by multiple artists including Gospel singer Debra Ashley, who has a song, "Praise Party," on her album, New Birth, and was healed from a heart attack. Praise parties are opportunities to celebrate creatively without excessive alcohol, illegal drugs and partner-sex outside of marriage. Some of the best medicines are humor, forgiveness and marital sex.

Health is a hot topic today that is a wonderful, worthy and wise way to fulfilling Matthew 28:18-20 Amplified Bible which says, "Jesus approached and, breaking the silence, said to them, All authority (all power of rule) in heaven and on earth has been given to Me. Go then and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them into the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, Teaching them to observe everything that I have commanded you, and behold, I am with you all the days (perpetually, uniformly, and on every occasion), to the [very] close and consummation of the age. Amen (so let it be)."

Forming and maintaining good friendships through disciplining is good for us and good for others. Dr. Derek Grier says in his book, 60 Minutes of Wisdom Insight In an Instant, "I do not need a prophetic gift to predict where you will be in five years. Anyone can forecast your tomorrow by looking at the people you hang around today. First Corinthians 15:33 says, "Do not be misled: 'Bad company corrupts good character.'" Imagine what good company might do! Many people have questioned the importance of becoming part of a church. I think the answer can be illustrated in nature. I have read that when geese form the V formation, the whole flock adds over 70 percent to its flying range. When each bird flaps its wings, it becomes uplift for the birds that are following. Please don't mishear me. Don't just join any church, but find a church where you experience uplift. Find a church that flies in divine order, and then don't just sit and stare; connect your gifts and talents to the formation."

Please share an on-line comment about Christian groups that uplift others in the areas of physical and/or mental health. Also tweet with me. My Twitter name is Michelelove30. Recommend this article on Google.