Caliente! (Hot!)

People with different minds and disabilities have sexuality and sex.

"Being born without arms and legs was not God's way of punishing me. I know that now. I have come to realize that this "disability" would actually heighten my ability to serve His purpose as a speaker and evangelist," says Nick Vujicic, who was born with tetra-amelia syndrome, a rare disorder characterized by the absence of all four limbs, in his book Unstoppable The Incredible Power of Faith in Action. Nick is married to Kanae Loida Vujicic-Miyahara. Yesterday, February 13, 2013, Kiyoshi James Vujicic was the first child born to Nick and Kanae.

Disability rights activist Ed Roberts is paralyzed from the neck down. When he was a young person beginning to express interest in sex, some told him to give up on his dreams. But Ed turned his dreams into reality and now has a son conceived through sexual intercourse.

David Ring also did not listen to those who told him he wouldn't get married, have kids or preach because he has cerebral palsy. Ring got married, has four children and has preached to more than 6,000 churches internationally.

Sex researcher Alfred Kinsey found people enjoy expanded physical prowess under the influence of sexual arousal. Kinsey discovered that a stutterer loses his stutter. A person with cerebral palsy gains greater control of their muscles.

Some do not have God-sized thinking when it comes to empowering those with different minds, the disabled and others to live their dreams. Margaret Sanger was the founder of the Planned Parenthood Federation of America (PPFA) and the International Planned Parenthood Federation (IPPF). As an activist in the birth control and population control movements she advocated for the reduction of births among blacks, other people of color, the disabled and those of limited financial means. Planned Parenthood today is the largest provider of abortions to blacks, other people of color, the disabled and those of limited financial means. Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg in a July 2009 New York Times interview says, "Frankly I had thought that at the time Roe was decided, there was concern about population growth and particularly growth in populations that we don't want to have too many of. So that Roe was going to be then setup for Medicaid funding for abortion."

Let's shift the focus from eliminating people to eliminating poverty and other obstacles to victorious living. Read my article, "Faith, Fear and Japanese Americans."

Our thinking can be the biggest barrier to bold, bountiful living. Ask God to totally take over our thought processes, emotions and our total person. Small-mindedness is a slippery slope to stagnancy. Everyone is disabled to some extent; we all have some inabilities. Cry out to God for the disabled like the father did in response to Jesus recorded in Mark 9:23-24 New Living Translation Bible, and expect to receive miracles: "What do you mean, 'If I can'?" Jesus asked. "Anything is possible if a person believes." The father instantly cried out, "I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!""

Christian, former U.S. four-term President Franklin Delano Roosevelt was disabled, and he fought to have the technology necessary to live the best possible life. Since he could not use his legs due to paralysis from polio, Roosevelt used hand controls to drive.

James Anderson DePreist was a black conductor of international renown, made more than 50 recordings, published two books and received numerous honors, including the National Medal of Arts given to to him by President George W. Bush in 2005. The National Medal of Arts is the highest honor for artistic excellence in the country. DePreist also had polio, used a motorized wheelchair and refused to let disability or blackness stop him from believing and achieving. DePreist died February 8, 2013, and lived as the husband of Ginette DePreist for 32 years. He had two daughters, Tracy and Jennifer, from his first marriage and two grandchildren. Being widowed or divorced does not have to mean we are done living.

As an American culture we think of people with different minds and disabilities as being either asexual, or the topic is taboo. Taboos can sometimes be a territory that Satan dominates. Strip Satan. What are some things we may not know about sex and sexuality in the different minds and disability community?

Fear is a contributor to wrong and limited thinking on sex and sexuality. For much of American history it was illegal for people of different races to be married. It wasn't until 1967, which just happens to be the year I was born, that interracial marriage in America was legal. Before it was legal Fred and Ann Jealous were a white and black couple. Benjamin Jealous, their son and a Rhodes scholar, is currently the president of the NAACP, the oldest civil rights organization in the country, which just had a birthday on February 12.

Ignorance is also an issue in wrong and limited thinking on sex and sexuality. It wasn't that many years ago that my son, Rafael Damani Fowler, who has autism, and I were in an auto shop and a man expressed aversion to Rafael as if he could catch autism like a communicable disease. And yes, Rafael, has single sexuality that he celebrates within balanced, beautiful, Biblical boundaries. Abraham Lincoln, who issued the Emancipation Proclamation in 1863, encouraging border states to outlaw slavery, helped push through Congress the Thirteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution, which finally freed all the slaves nationwide in December 1865, led the United States through the American Civil War preserving the Union and battled periods of depression, has some good advice: "I don't like that man. I must get to know him better."

Instead of a holiday honoring multiple presidents on one day, what about a separate Federal holiday recognizing Lincoln whose birthday is February 12, 1809?

An abundant, enjoyable, full, overflowing life is for whosoever is willing to live in the ways of God. Disability does not have to stop someone from living a delightful, dynamic life. Read my article "Disability and a Dynamic Life." God welcomes all people to delightful, dynamic living. We can too. Christian, African American Marian Wright Edelman says, "When Jesus Christ asked little children to come to him, he didn't say only rich children, or White children, or children with two-parent families, or children who didn't have a mental or physical handicap. He said, "Let all children come unto me.""

If we are disabled or in a group some don't want too many if any of, God wants us all and gave us sexuality, sex and the right to life and reproduction for our joy and good.

While we may not want to have autism, depression, tetra-amelia syndrome, cerebral palsy, polio, paralysis or something else, God allowed it. On Orpah's OWN network Vujicic, who does not have arms or legs, said to everyone, "You are beautiful just the way you are." He also said, "You can be angry for what you don't have, or be thankful for what you do have." What a spicy, sex secret now revealed that when it's practiced is guaranteed to thwart body-image problems that create barriers in the bedroom and other areas of lovemaking. Read my article "Sexual Dissatisfaction."

God created sex and sexuality. What God creates is good, very good. Gospel singer Donnie McClurkin, who is victorious over homosexuality, sings in his song, "I'm Walking," "I'm walking in authority, living life without apology. It's not wrong dear. I belong here. So you might as well get use to me." Christ confidence is another spicy sex secret now revealed.

Disability and a Dynamic Life

No matter what life throws at us keep moving forward. Dr. Georgia L. McMurray was thrown Charcot-Marie-Tooth Atrophy, a neuromuscular, degenerative disease that left her completely paralyzed. She was physically disabled but not downcast in her outlook on life.
　
From her motorized wheelchair she continued her research as one of the nation's top educators and continued to advocate for families, children and the poor. She founded more than one organization over the course of her adult life. One such organization was the GLM Group which was a consulting firm that provided research, training and technical assistance to government and non-profit organizations working with families, children and the poor.
　
More than two decades ago Dr. McMurray founded Project Teen Aid to help teenage mothers and their babies excel in life. When Project Teen Aid was founded in 1966 teen moms where expelled from school because authorities thought this would help stem the spread of teenage motherhood. Dr. McCurray said that this practice would foster poverty, deny people the opportunity to connect behavior with outcomes and was discriminatory.
　
The devil tries to stop us with many things including disease. Dr. McMurray said often right up until her death at age 58, "I ask God for strength to continue the journey." Dr. McMurray was disabled, but she was not downcast and defeated. She took what God gave her and worked it for His glory. Acts 1:8 Amplified Bible says, "But you shall receive power (ability, efficiency, and might) when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you shall be My witnesses in Jerusalem and all Judea and Samaria and to the ends (the very bounds) of the earth."
　
Excellence should be an example that all Christians display. Dr. Derek Grier, who has battled severe illness in his life, writes in his book, 60 Minutes of Wisdom, "Actor Michael J. Fox made this statement, "I am careful not to confuse excellence with perfection. Excellence, I can reach for; perfection is God's business. The most anyone can ever do in life is his or her very best. Sometimes we find that our best is not enough and in such moments all that we can do is trust God.

The King James Version Bible says in Psalm 138:8, "The Lord will perfect that which concerneth me." I do not know what Michael J. Fox believes about God, but he stated a biblical truth. All of us must make peace with the fact that we are less than perfect. But we must daily wage war against any notion that we should settle for being anything less than excellent."

Dr. McMurray had a short life dying at age 58, but it was a dynamic life. Former U.S. president Abraham Lincoln, who battled depression, said, "In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years." I imagine when Dr. McMurray met God the Father, God the Son Jesus Christ and God the Holy Ghost (1 X 1 X 1 = 1 or like water which can be liquid, ice or steam) that He said something like Matthew 25:21 Amplified Bible which says, "His master said to him, Well done, you upright (honorable, admirable) and faithful servant! You have been faithful and trustworthy over a little; I will put you in charge of much. Enter into and share the joy (the delight, the blessedness) which your master enjoys." Please leave an on-line comment with simple ways to describe the Trinity.

Please also share an on-line comment regarding excellence in persons who are mentally and/or physically disabled. I would love to tweet with you. My Twitter name is "Michelelove30." Please also recommend this article on Google.

In the United States, India and many countries of the world females and the disabled are aborted because they are females and/or disabled. In the novel, Secret Daughter by Shilpi  Somaya Gowda, Kavita and Jasu are married. Shortly after Kavita gives birth to their first-born child, Jasu takes the child away and arranges to kill their baby girl through infanticide simply because the baby is a girl. When their second child is born Kavita conspires with her sister to defy Jasu and gives the girl to an orphanage. When Kavita is pregnant with their third child, Secret Daughter says, "A new medical clinic in the neighboring village offers ultrasounds to expectant mothers, ostensibly to check the health of the baby. But it is well known that those who go there do so to learn the gender of their unborn child. The procedure will cost two hundred rupees, a month's earnings from their crops, as well as a full day to make the journey. They will have to use all the money they've been saving for new farming tools, but despite the hardship, Kavita agrees. She knows if the test shows another girl growing in her womb, all of the possible outcomes are wrenching. Jasu can demand she have an abortion, right there at the clinic if they had the money. Or he could simply cast her out, forcing her to endure the shame of raising the child alone. She would be shunned, like the other beecharis in the village. But even this, becoming an outcast from her home and community, would not be as bad as the alternative. She cannot face the agony of giving birth, of holding her baby in her arms, only to have it taken away again. Kavita knows in her soul she simply will not survive that."
 
Please share an on-line comment about sex-selection abortion and abortion of the disabled.

Many babies are being aborted just because they have a disability, or two or more. With scientific progress perhaps many if not most of the disabilities that exist today will be healed in full in the future. Luke 1:37 Amplified Bible says, "For with God nothing is ever impossible and no word from God shall be without power or impossible of fulfillment." In a test case in 2005 a man who had accidentally severed off his fingertip was able to regrow it entirely in four weeks! My son, Rafael Damani Fowler, has autism. We don't personally know of anyone who has been healed of autism, but maybe you do. Please leave an on-line comment about someone healed from autism or another disability.

Marriage Surprise

Many women think that to give love to a man and to receive love from that man in the union of marriage is one of life's most precious gifts that they are eagerly seeking to open. After Shyju Mathew's mom got married and opened her gift, she found a man bound by Satan with depression.

When comparing the man she knew before marriage with the man she lived with after marriage, she may have asked herself something like, "Yah kaun hai?" ("Who is this?") Please leave on-line comments sharing some surprises in your spouse and yourself after marriage.
　
Mathew's mom's husband practiced witchcraft. He was tormented and would throw angry fits often. She hated her life and wanted to commit suicide, but before she could do it, she discovered she was pregnant. Unlike the Tahina spectabilis palm tree which produces flowers only once, and then collapses to the ground and dies, Mathew's mom decided against suicide in response to a bad marriage and an unplanned pregnancy.

When she asked herself questions like, "Kya ap khus hai? ("Are you happy?") The answer was, "Nahi," ("No.")

God wants us to enjoy our life. God the Son Jesus Christ says in John 10:10 Amplified Bible, "The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it overflows)." David writes about God in Psalm 16:11 English Standard Version Bible, "You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore."

An enjoyable earthly life is not one where we are ever emotionally high. Joy is some times a choice believers can make because God the Holy Ghost has given us the fruit of self-control. We have to wait until the next life to have an eternal emotional high when we live face-to-face with God.

Meanwhile in this earthly life, unhappiness is not an excuse to do evil like paying someone to take the life of our unborn baby (abortion). Instead follow the advice of the song, "Encourage Yourself," by The Tri-City Singers: "Some times you have to encourage yourself. Some times you have to speak victory during the test. And no matter how you feel speak the Word, and you will be healed. Speak over yourself. Encourage yourself in the Lord."
  　
Mathew's mom determined, "I'm going to live for this child's sake." An unwanted pregnancy does not have to influence a woman to become mentally ill or suicidal. Roman Stoic philosopher Epictetus said, "Circumstances do not make the man; they merely reveal him to himself."

Mathew's mom prayed that her baby would be a priest, a writer, a singer and a whole bunch of other good things. God answered her prayer. Like Hannah she dedicated her first born to God. When Mathew came home from school, his mom encouraged him to pray.
　
Mathew says she didn't force him to pray; he liked to pray. In fact he loved to pray. His mother paid attention to Mathew's interest and encouraged it. The Law of Concentration says that "whatever you dwell upon grows and increases in your life."
　
Observe what good things our children are interested in and encourage them. My son, Rafael Damani Fowler, loves playing CDs. He enjoys it for hours. Mathew enjoys praying for hours.
　
Mathew prayed so much that when he was seven years old, someone asked him to preach. Mathew asked his mom what to preach. His mom said, "Never ask a human being what to preach." She further counseled him to go to his bedroom and seek God.
　
Mathew has been seeking God and preaching ever since. He also writes and sings among other things on an international scale.
　
Parents are called to mold a child capable of positively impacting people beyond measure. Lord Jesus, let us parents live in our calling daily.

Being the example we want our children to be is excellent teaching. Immanuel Kant advises, "Resolve to behave as though your every act were to become a universal law for all people." The Apostle Paul instructs in 1 Corinthians 11:1 Amplified Bible, "Pattern yourselves after me [follow my example], as I imitate and follow Christ (the Messiah)." Are you bold and truthful enough to instruct your children and other people likewise?

Heart Disease, Depression and Christianity

Following a diagnosis of coronary-artery disease and bypass surgery it is not uncommon to slide into depression. One of the reasons for the slide into depression is a break-down in our body's communication system.

Neurotransmitters are more than 60 chemicals in the body that communicate between neurons. Depression interferes with the production and processing of neurotransmitters which impacts heart disease and other diseases like diabetes, cancer, Parkinson's disease, epilepsy, stroke and Alzheimer's.

Sometimes people consider physical health as more important than mental health. The reality is that they both need our regular attention, and failing to take good care of ourselves physically and mentally is dangerous. Many people know that heart disease can be fatal, but they may not know that so can depression. In addition to the link between hearth disease and depression, most of the 30,000 American suicides annually stem from clinical depression. "One out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you," says author Rita Mae Brown.

Help to overcome all types of illness can be found through God, the Church and living according to the Word of God. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 Amplified Bible says, "Thank [God] in everything [no matter what the circumstances may be, be thankful and give thanks], for this is the will of God for you [who are] in Christ Jesus [the Revealer and Mediator of that will]."

Disobedience to God is deadly. Obedience to God opens opportunities for eminent, enjoyable living. Neal Krause, a sociologist and public-health expert at the University of Michigan, has since 1997 conducted a study of 1,500 people. One of the study's findings is that people who maintain a mindset of gratitude for what's going right in their lives have a reduced incidence of depression.

Sometimes we do not even know that we are depressed. Michael Hyatt in his "Get Out of That Funk" article at michaelhyatt.com on February 6, 2013 lists seven questions to ask ourselves:

    "Question #1: Am I getting plenty of rest?
    Question #2: Am I exercising three to four times a week?
    Question #3: Am I eating high-energy foods?
    Question #4: Am I staying hydrated?
    Question #5: Am I getting enough sunshine?
    Question #6: Am I focusing on the positive?
    Question #7: Am I hanging out with energetic people?"

Maintaining our health requires a multifaceted approach. Maintaining our health is loving God, ourselves and other people. Love is not limited to feelings; love is actions and interactions. In addition to a relationship with God the Father, God the Son Jesus Christ and God the Holy Ghost and living based on the Bible, help to live healthy can also be found through medical professionals and support groups. The North Carolina Black Churches United for Better Health involved 50 churches with 2,500 members mixing spiritual and communal life with eating better and exercising more. This group became a national group, called the Body and Soul project, with the same objective.

Your Christian fellowship may prayerfully consider starting a health support group if it does not already have one, and/or maybe your church could hold regular praise parties playing music by multiple artists including Gospel singer Debra Ashley, who has a song, "Praise Party," on her album, New Birth, and was healed from a heart attack. Praise parties are opportunities to celebrate creatively without excessive alcohol, illegal drugs and partner-sex outside of marriage. Some of the best medicines are humor, forgiveness and marital sex.

Health is a hot topic today that is a wonderful, worthy and wise way to fulfilling Matthew 28:18-20 Amplified Bible which says, "Jesus approached and, breaking the silence, said to them, All authority (all power of rule) in heaven and on earth has been given to Me. Go then and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them into the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, Teaching them to observe everything that I have commanded you, and behold, I am with you all the days (perpetually, uniformly, and on every occasion), to the [very] close and consummation of the age. Amen (so let it be)."

Forming and maintaining good friendships through disciplining is good for us and good for others. Dr. Derek Grier says in his book, 60 Minutes of Wisdom Insight In an Instant, "I do not need a prophetic gift to predict where you will be in five years. Anyone can forecast your tomorrow by looking at the people you hang around today. First Corinthians 15:33 says, "Do not be misled: 'Bad company corrupts good character.'" Imagine what good company might do! Many people have questioned the importance of becoming part of a church. I think the answer can be illustrated in nature. I have read that when geese form the V formation, the whole flock adds over 70 percent to its flying range. When each bird flaps its wings, it becomes uplift for the birds that are following. Please don't mishear me. Don't just join any church, but find a church where you experience uplift. Find a church that flies in divine order, and then don't just sit and stare; connect your gifts and talents to the formation."

Please share an on-line comment about Christian groups that uplift others in the areas of physical and/or mental health. Also tweet with me. My Twitter name is Michelelove30. Recommend this article on Google.

Is She Depressed?

Why do women often fail to see the symptoms of depression until they are serious (persistent sad or anxious mood, loss of interest in usual activities, feelings of worthlessness, difficulty concentrating, forgetfulness, difficulty in making decisions, sleep/appetite changes, decreased energy, loss of sex drive (yes, this is serious to our marriages,) thoughts of self-injury, even suicide, or any combination of these symptoms)? Women tend to attribute our symptoms to other things, such as fatigue from work or family care.

Depression may be the result of the following six typical scenarios:

1) family history of depression. Some depressions may be an inherited imbalance in brain chemicals.
2) puberty, adolescence, pregnancy, postpartum, menstrual cycles and menopause. Basically female developmental and hormonal changes often accompany depression.
3) life events, such as childhood trauma, violence or abuse in current relationships, poor health, a serous personal loss or emotional wound like divorce, bankruptcy, job loss, death of a loved one, business failure, housing foreclosure or eviction, multiple negative experiences coming one after the other or some other life event.
4) on-going life stress, such as single parenting, caring for elderly or disabled family member(s), lower pay in the employment market, discrimination based on gender, race, ethnicity, religion, disability, employment culture that fails to appreciate, advocate and advance our abilities and talents, stubborn, selfish supervisor or something else.
5) ways of thinking that can enable depression, such as difficulty with assertiveness, passivity, reluctance to rock the boat in relationships or shyness in seeking our own needs in a loving way.
6) difficulty setting boundaries with others.

Women may try to cope with depression in harmful ways, such as substance abuse, overeating, excessive spending, isolation, taking on too much responsibility or conversely not taking on enough responsibility, not financially managing our lives or some other way.

While twice as many women as men have depression any one can have depression, even the strong. Israelite King and Warrior David had times of depression.

However the depression comes, seven steps are helpful to coming out of depression:

1) Receive and passionately nurture a relationship with God the Father, God the Son Jesus Christ and God the Holy Ghost.
2) Engage in on-going studying and meditating on God's Word for the remedy to correct thought patterns and actions that lead to depression and maintain depression.
3) Surround ourselves with spiritually mature Christian family and friends. Sometimes family and/or friends help us to see depression that God has been trying to reveal to us through His Word and prayer for a long time, but we didn't receive the message and need others to help us receive the message.
4) Seek professional, spiritually mature, skillful Christian counsel. Therapy and counseling are not value neutral. Our health can be compromised by someone with beliefs and behavior contrary to the Bible. Healing has its source in God. Luke 6:19 Amplified Bible says, "And all the multitude were seeking to touch Him, for healing power was all the while going forth from Him and curing them all [saving them from severe illnesses or calamities]." Contact me at my email address michelefrancesjackson@hotmail.com or ask our spiritually mature Christian family members and friends for referrals to Christian professionals.  
5) Eat and exercise with proper nutrition, amount, frequency and balance. 3 John 1:2 New Living Translation Bible says, "Dear friend, I hope all is well with you and that you are as healthy in body as you are strong in spirit."
6) Partake in regular activities that we enjoy like dancing, foreign language classes or something else. Not only will we meet new people we will also be compelled to release and replace negative thought patterns with positive ones. We have a right to enjoy our lives. Jesus Christ says in John 10:10 Amplified Bible, "The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it overflows)."  
7) Continuously think we are a priceless treasures. Life is full of discomfort, distress, disappointment and bad decisions, but God still values and loves us. We do not have to work to earn the love of God; He freely gives His love. Failing does not mean we are frauds. Psalm 127:2 Amplified Bible says, "It is vain for you to rise up early, to take rest late, to eat the bread of [anxious] toil--for He gives [blessings] to His beloved in sleep."

Please share stories of coming out of depression.

Something Horrible Happened?

Psychologists say we are born with two instinctive fears: the fear of loud noises and the fear of being dropped. God is so good that even if our fear of hearing loud noises and of being dropped comes true we can still have an awesome life.

Mephibosheth was dropped as a five-year-old and became crippled in both feet as a result (2 Samuel 4). He was also crippled in his mind holding a "dead dog" self-image (2 Samuel 9).

But God arranged for Mephibosheth to eat at the king's table, live on royal land being served by Ziba, Ziba's 15 sons and 20 servants from adulthood to death.

If something horrible happens to you like being crippled in both feet or in your mind or something else, press through the fear, shock, disappointment, anger, unforgiveness, depression and other negative emotions and go frequently and boldly to God asking Him for way more than you deserve or seems reasonable to live an awesome life in spite of misfortunes, challenges and differences.

Believers don't serve a miserly God who metes out cold justice. Our God loves extravagantly.

Sometimes in American culture we forget about loving people extravagantly and go to war over our misfortunes, challenges and differences. One example is the mommy wars. Whether we are mothers whose full-time work is to raise children like Pauletta Washington (wife of actor Denzel Washington) or mothers who are also employees, business owners, non-profit employees and non-profit owners like Naomi Zacharias of Wellspring International, Joyce Meyer of Joyce Meyer Ministries or Cookie Lee of Cookie Lee Jewelry, we all have God-given purpose and roles in life. And this is also true for women who are complete and successful as singles without children like the first African-American female U.S. secretary of state, Condolezza Rice, who is currently a CBS News contributor.

Many seem to have fear that if someone lives differently it is a threat to their lifestyle. Yet God created each one of us as unique. Even twins do not have the same fingerprint.

God didn't create us to be isolated and hostile but integrated and friendly. Mothers who raise their children full-time and mothers who are also employees, business owners, non-profit employees and non-profit owners all need help raising their children. Sometimes we need the participation of more than fathers and other family members. Sheila Lirio Marcelo gave birth to her first son while in college. A few years later her parents emigrated to the United States from the Philippines and were helping with childcare when her father had a heart attack, suddenly switching from a childcare provider to one who needed care. Marcelo did not allow the fear, shock, pain and difficulty of the situation to keep her down indefinitely. She turned evil into good. Out of this horrible experience Marcelo created Care.com which provides services to find caregivers for typical and different children, seniors and pets. Care.com also helps with selecting tutors and housekeepers among other things.

Vive mas (live more). What ridiculous request have you asked of God in the face of fear and other negativity and found the path to awesome living?