Balanced, Beautiful, Biblical Living

Hebrews 13:20-21 Amplified Bible says, "Now may the God of peace [Who is the Author and the Giver of peace], Who brought again from among the dead our Lord Jesus, that great Shepherd of the sheep, by the blood [that sealed, ratified] the everlasting agreement (covenant, testament), Strengthen (complete, perfect) and make you what you ought to be and equip you with everything good that you may carry out His will; [while He Himself] works in you and accomplishes that which is pleasing in His sight, through Jesus Christ (the Messiah); to Whom be the glory forever and ever (to the ages of the ages). Amen (so be it)." God wants all good things for His creyentes (believers). Former Mexican President Benito Juarez said, "The respect for the rights of others is peace."

Slavery and peace are incompatible. June 19th is Juneteenth, also known as Freedom Day or Emancipation Day in the United States of America. Juneteenth is a celebration of the end of African-American slavery in the United States of America.

On June 18, 2013, the United States House of Representatives voted in favor of H.R. 1797 the Pain-Capable Unborn Child Protection Act which puts a national prohibition on abortions of unborn girls and unborn boys aged 20 weeks and older. The Pain-Capable Unborn Child Protection Act respects the rights of the unborn who are people too deserving of peace, freedom and other good gifts from God.

God knows how to give good gifts. In addition to giving creyentes eternal life, God gave creyentes sabbaths to worship Him and to keep economic activity as a balanced part of our lives instead of consuming our lives. One sabbath God gave lasts for one year in the Old Testament. The Old Testament is a foreshadow of better things to come in the New Testament. Dads, moms, children, singles and everyone benefits when a one-year-and-more of paid leave is a global employment reality. Biblical living is beautiful, balanced living.

The Chinese invented the toothbrush. A clean mouth promotes dental health, beautiful teeth and fresh breath. May we be cleansed from the unhealthy, ugly disrespect of people through slavery, abortion and excessive economic work. May we celebrate God and the good life He gave us.

Un Corrido Nuevo (A New Ballad)

Zacchaeus was a rich government worker who had cheated people financially. Then he met Jesus Christ, entered into a relationship with Christ and restored by four times the things he had stole as a chief tax collector. Luke 19:1-10 Amplified Bible says, "And [Jesus] entered Jericho and was passing through it. And there was a man called Zacchaeus, a chief tax collector, and [he was] rich. And he was trying to see Jesus, which One He was, but he could not on account of the crowd, because he was small in stature. So he ran on ahead and climbed up in a sycamore tree in order to see Him, for He was about to pass that way. And when Jesus reached the place, He looked up and said to him, Zacchaeus, hurry and come down; for I must stay at your house today. So he hurried and came down, and he received and welcomed Him joyfully. And when the people saw it, they all muttered among themselves and indignantly complained, He has gone in to be the guest of and lodge with a man who is devoted to sin and preeminently a sinner. So then Zacchaeus stood up and solemnly declared to the Lord, See, Lord, the half of my goods I [now] give [by way of restoration] to the poor, and if I have cheated anyone out of anything, I [now] restore four times as much. And Jesus said to him, Today is [Messianic and spiritual] salvation come to [all the members of] this household, since Zacchaeus too is a [real spiritual] son of Abraham; For the Son of Man came to seek and to save that which was lost."

America has benefited greatly from the labor of voluntary and involuntary immigrants without always treating them well. Now is a good time to begin to right the wrongs. Immigrants shouldn't have to pay to become citizens nor should they be denied tax benefits available to others.

God wants all people to be treated well no matter where they live or who they are. Desmond Tutu of South Africa said in a sermon delivered in Norway, "At home in South Africa I have sometimes said in big meetings where you have black and white together: "Raise your hands!" Then I've said, "Move your hands," and I've said, "Look at your hands--different colors representing different people. You are the rainbow people of God."

And you remember the rainbow in the Bible is the sign of peace. The rainbow is the sign of prosperity. We want peace, prosperity and justice and we can have it when all the people of God, the rainbow people of God, work together."

Jesus Christ wants us to have spiritual, psychological, physical and financial prosperity.

The Chinese invented paper money. God teaches us in the Bible book of Deuteronomy chapter 28 that when we do right money comes. Let's make a new corrido (a ballad) about America doing spiritually, psychologically, physically and financially right by immigrants.

Let Unity Rain

Salmo 133 Biblia Bilingue Version Reina-Valera 1960 dice, "Mirad cuan bueno y cuan delicioso es habitar los hermanos juntos en armonia! Es como el buen oleo sobre la cabeza, el cual desciende sobre la barba, la barba de Aaron, y baja hasta el borde de sus vestiduras; como el rocio de Hermon, que desciende sobre los montes de Sion; porque alli envia Jehova bendicion, y vida eterna." Psalm 133 Bilingual Bible New King James Version says, "Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! It is like the precious oil upon the head, running down on the beard, the beard of Aaron, running down the edge of his garments. It is like the dew of Hermon, descending upon the mountains of Zion; for there the Lord commanded the blessing--life forevermore."
When Birmingham, Alabama's Public Safety Commissioner Eugene Connor ordered fire fighters to "Let 'em have it" in May 1963, the children of Birmingham who were marching in protest of segregation didn't find the water of the fire hoses like pleasant dew. The water blasted off clothes and caused some to smash into buildings and trees. Police clubs and police dogs also attacked the crusading children.

Enduring the clash was worth it. Next month in June 1963 President John F. Kennedy gave a speech on civil rights and announced a new civil rights bill. The year 1963 also happens to be the year that the Organization of African Unity -- now known as the African Union headquartered in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia -- was formed.

Living in oneness requires the removal of oppression. Good relationships and mistreatment do not match. Each human being is made in the image of God. God the King of Kings requires people to treat Him with love and respect. God made people with a built-in desire for love and respect.

The suspension bridge was invented in China. While everyone is made in the image of God, sin disconnects people from God. Jesus Christ is the Bridge (the Way) connecting creyentes (believers) to God. God wants creyentes to live in unity. Ephesians 4:3-6 Amplified Bible says, "Be eager and strive earnestly to guard and keep the harmony and oneness of [and produced by] the Spirit in the binding power of peace. [There is] one body and one Spirit—just as there is also one hope [that belongs] to the calling you received—[There is] one Lord, one faith, one baptism, One God and Father of [us] all, Who is above all [Sovereign over all], pervading all and [living] in [us] all."

Is there something special that could be done in June 2013 to promote unity? Write to:

Michele F. Jackson
P. O. Box 2106
Woodbridge, Virginia 22195

Follow Michele F. Jackson on Twitter at http://www.twitter.com/michelelove30.

Embrace People. Erase the Spirit of Fear.

Jesus Christ sweated blood in the garden of Gethsemane knowing He was going to be beaten, crucified and killed for the sins of creyentes (believers.) After He was beaten, crucified and resurrected from the dead in three days, Jesus Christ had paid the debt owed God the Father for sin. 

As creyentes we have a new life as reyes y reinas (kings and queens) empowered by God the Holy Ghost, who is love, joy, peace, patience, faithfulness, gentleness, kindness, goodness and self-control. Having peace and the other qualities does not mean that we will not work hard to live in peace and in the other qualities which are interconnected.

"The more we sweat in peace, the less we bleed in war," says Vijaya Lakshmi Pandit, the first woman president of the United Nations. Some succumb to the spirit of fear and refuse to sweat in peace.

The spirit of fear is the greatest threat to love and to peace. 1 John 4:18 Complete Jewish Bible says, "There is no fear in love. On the contrary, love that has achieved its goal gets rid of fear, because fear has to do with punishment; the person who keeps fearing has not been brought to maturity in regard to love."

Because the Chinese government is afraid of people, they punish pro-creation. China's one child policy has killed more than 330 million baby boys and baby girls via abortion and more than 190 million people have been sterilized.

How many adolescent and adult women and men have been killed by China's one child policy? ChinaAid News reports in the May 18, 2013, article "Family Planning Officials in Jiangsu Province Beat Farmer to Near Death for Unauthorized Births," "Zhang Futao, of Group Five, Nangou Village, in the town of Beigou, in Xinyi city, is now hospitalized in critical condition and fighting for his life after suffering severe head injuries from the beating by the family planning officials who burst into his home at about 8 p.m. on Wednesday (May 15). They then kidnapped Zhang to Tashan Brigade and made his family pay a ransom." Zhang Futao and his wife have three children, a girl age 12, a boy age six and another girl age 4. Read the full story at http://www.chinaaid.org/2013/05/family-planning-officials-in-jiangsu.html.

America's sexuality policies are not as soaked in fear as China's sexuality policies. We cannot take comfort or congratulate ourselves. More than 55 million baby girls and baby boys have been killed via abortion in America. Adolescent and adult women die from abortion. Tonya Reaves, a 24-year-old African-American woman, died July 20, 2012, on the operating table of a Chicago, Illinois, Planned Parenthood as a result of an abortion-induced hemorrhage reported a local CBS television station.

The following LifeNews.com link shows that Kermit Gosnell is not the only abortionists killing late-term unborn babies, babies born live after botched abortions and women: http://www.lifenews.com/2013/05/15/another-gosnell-report-shows-texas-abortion-doc-kills-babies-born-alive/.

Some Nigerians share kola nuts to signify friendship. The global and American national media can show women and men friendship by thoroughly investigating abortionist Douglas Karpen and the entire abortion industry.

Late-term abortions can be done to kill baby girls and baby boys suspected of being disabled. Why should being disabled be a death sentence? Helen Keller, who is blind and death, says, "I thank God for my handicaps, for through them, I have found myself, my work, and my God."

After a speaking tour in the 1930s in Japan to improve conditions for the blind there, the Japanese gave Helen Keller an Akita dog. The Japanese and many other people enjoy and are enhanced by Helen Keller.

Embrace people. Erase the spirit of fear.  A Persian proverb says, "Human beings are part of each other, they are created from the same clay."

Keep Out?

Solomon, preacher, poet and king, wrote in Ecclesiastes 1:9 Complete Jewish Bible, "What has been is what will be, what has been done is what will be done, and there is nothing new under the sun."

Comedian Dave Chappelle, a nonbeliever in God the Father, God the Son Jesus Christ and God the Holy Ghost, recently made a Solomon-like observation. "Remarking on the feat of building the Great Wall of China, he marveled, tongue in cheek, "I didn't know they had Mexicans" (The New York Times, April 2, 2013, "Comedian And Jokes Return, Tweaked.") Efforts to keep out foreigners, war and poverty are continual themes in human history.

Defense is necessary. So are major peace offensives.

John Maxwell, author, speaker, entrepreneur, has a daily email, A Minute with Maxwell, with a thought word for the day. Today's thought word is "maximizer."

Fe (faith) comes by hearing. Let's maximize the numbers of people who hear about God and enter into relationships with Dios (God) and creyentes (believers).

Of course some people will not receive Jesus Christ. Some also will not form close relationships with us. An Egyptian saying for a person who is unsuccessful at becoming intimate with another person is, "A thousand raps at the door, but no salute or invitation from within."

The Apostle Paul teaches us to examine ourselves to see our spiritual state; we may find that we have some barriers to forming good relationships that need to be broken. Paul also encourages us to go out of our way to relate well, not in a way that violates Biblical principles but rather shows Biblical principles lived beautifully. 1 Corinthians 9:20-23 the Message Bible says, "Even though I am free of the demands and expectations of everyone, I have voluntarily become a servant to any and all in order to reach a wide range of people: religious, nonreligious, meticulous moralists, loose-living immoralists, the defeated, the demoralized—whoever. I didn’t take on their way of life. I kept my bearings in Christ—but I entered their world and tried to experience things from their point of view. I’ve become just about every sort of servant there is in my attempts to lead those I meet into a God-saved life. I did all this because of the Message. I didn’t just want to talk about it; I wanted to be in on it!"

Please share some major peace offensives.

Strong Feet

Abraham Lincoln said, "I do not like that man. I must get to know him better." Creyentes (believers) are here to connect with people, enemies included, to introduce them to God and to encourage a growing relationship with Him. Growing in God includes growing in human relationships.

Ephesians 6:15 Amplified Bible says, "And having shod your feet in preparation [to face the enemy with the firm-footed stability, the promptness, and the readiness produced by the good news] of the Gospel of peace."

All creyentes (believers) have their feet shod in peace to move into relationships and to develop them. Having something is not the same as using it effectively.

Jan Ernst Matzeliger's mom was a black woman from Suriname, South America, and his father was a Dutch person from Holland. Matzeliger eventually left South America and came to the United States of America. After 1877 as he worked in a shoe manufacturing company, he noticed that production was slow because workers had to attach the bottom of shoes to the top by hand. Only 50 shoes could be made by hand daily. So Matzeliger invented a machine to increase production. Matzeliger was a man who clearly had a good mission in life, but many rejected him because of his race.

A Chinese proverb says, "Climbing a tree to seek for fish;" it means "attempting to do the impossible." Embracing people who are different may seem impossible. We may not like the personality, physical characteristics and/or something else about a co-worker, boss, spouse, child, family member, acquaintance or someone else. Our ultimate enemy and adversary, Satan, wants us to believe the lie that it's impossible to form a godly relationship with people, especially people we may not initially like. Satan also speaks various lies to us designed to destroy relationships.

Matzeliger developed more than one machine before he got a patent for the "Lasting Machine" that could rapidly stitch the leather of shoes to their soles. Matzeliger's machine turned out 150 to 700 shoes daily.

God has given creyentes feet with the Gospel of peace, so we can live out things like Acts 10:34 New Living Translation Bible which says, "Then Peter replied, “I see very clearly that God shows no favoritism." God's goodness is for whoever will receive Him.

Anytime is the right time to talk to God. When we find we know the Bible, but we cannot use our feet effectively or any part of the Bible, ask God for the strength to do it.

Where are some amazing places God has strengthened your feet to go?

Are You Playing Your Part Right?

Sometimes we are quick to put limits on ourselves and others because we focus on what someone cannot do. When God writes to husbands and wives, He doesn't say if you have autism or some other different mind, marriage is off limits for you.

Little by little marriage and romantic relationships for people with autism are being embraced in the media. Yesterday I saw an advertisement for a new book on romantic relationships for people with autism. One of my favorite movies is My Name Is Khan, which features the romance of Rizvan who has Asperger syndrome, a form of autism, and Mandira, who does not have autism.

God wants us to have good relationships. God made us the way we are on purpose. He designed our qualities to be developed instead of destroyed. Rizvan doesn't like touch. Rizvan and his mom find a way to negotiate hugs in a way that is mutually helpful. While Rizvan is not a Christian, finding a way to get along with people is. Romans 12:16 Amplified Bible says, "Live in harmony with one another; do not be haughty (snobbish, high-minded, exclusive), but readily adjust yourself to [people, things] and give yourselves to humble tasks. Never overestimate yourself or be wise in your own conceits."

Neither Rizvan's mom nor his wife try to takeover Rizvan and turn him into a duplicate of themselves. Sometimes in relationships the root source of conflict is trying to make people like us and doing what we want while failing to appreciate who they are and what they want. God made us different and with different desires.

Are our differences in line with the will of God? If not, we need to cooperate with God to correct our problems. If so, we are in position to be in harmony with and even help someone else.

Then we can ask are we willing to operate in the role God gave us to help others be what God called them to be? If we are and we do it, then playing our God-given role in romantic and other relationships removes a lot of conflict because we are building together instead of working against each other.

Disability Cannot Stop Us from Overcoming

Blanche Rudolph rubbed her daughter's, Wilma's, legs at home for two years and took her to twice-weekly appointments 50-miles-away-from-home to teach Wilma how to walk at the Meharry Hospital, the black medical college of Fisk University in Nashville, Tennessee. Blanche and her husband, Ed, could barely afford the medical treatment. They were very poor. Ed was a railroad worker. Blanche provided domestic help to wealthy, white women. Wilma was the 20th of their 22 children, and she was a sickly child who had contracted polio at the age of four paralyzing her legs and requiring leg braces on her left leg and foot and an orthopaedic shoe for support of her foot. Wilma also had other illnesses, such as measles, mumps, scarlet fever, chicken pox and double pneumonia.

Blanche, Ed, Wilma and other members of the Rudolph family kept the faith that inspired them to make the sacrifices to overcome Wilma's illness. Hebrews 11:1 Amplified Bible says, "Now faith is the assurance (the confirmation, the title deed) of the things [we] hope for, being the proof of things [we] do not see and the conviction of their reality [faith perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses]."

God honored the Rudolph's faith. Wilma came out of braces at age 11 and joined the basketball team. It wasn't long before her talent for sports manifested. In high school Ed Temple, the coach for the famous Tigerbells, the women's track team at Tennessee State University, recognized and developed Wilma's track and field talent.

Having an illness and/or disability does not have to always prevent one from participating in sports. In the 1960s Wilma became the fastest runner in the world! In the 1960 Summer Olympics in Rome, Italy, Rudolph became the first American woman to win three gold medals in track and field during a single Olympic Games. Wilma elevated women's track to a major presence in the United States. As member of the black community, she is also regarded as a civil rights and women's rights pioneer. The Italians nicknamed her, La Gazzella Negra, (The Black Gazelle). The French nicknamed her, La Perle Noire, (The Black Pearl.) In 1977 a made-for-TV docudrama aired titled Wilma.

God can do miracles like He did for the Rudolph's completely removing polio from Wilma. God can also do miracles leaving illness and/or disability in a person's life, yet still giving them a good and enjoyable life. In the mid-2000s discus thrower Carl Brown had a sponsorship from Nike and was training for the 2008 Beijing Olympics. Then one morning he woke up and couldn't walk. A friend drove Carl to the hospital where doctors performed tests and found that Carl had rheumatoid arthritis which robs about one percent of the world's population of flexibility in their joints.

Carl experienced fear, worry and depression regarding how he was going to support his six daughters financially. Carl went through a divorce, food stamps and disability before today building a personal-training business, Xtreem Training, in Georgia. Turning his life around was not overnight. Pasos cortos, vista larga, (Short steps, long view.)

Polio and rheumatoid arthritis threatened to ruin the lives of Wilma and Carl, but God. God says in Jeremiah 29:11 Amplified Bible, "For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome."

Please share a comment of plans for welfare and peace that God has manifested in your life, your family's life and/or a friend's life.

Relationship Foundation

God is one of a kind. He lives in harmonious relationship -- God the Father, God the Son Jesus Christ and God the Holy Ghost. We are each one of a kind. Even twins do not have the same fingerprints. God designed believers to become more like Him and for harmonious relationships.

While believers will not experience becoming fully like God and living in harmony in all our relationships in this life, we will experience more of God's best when we are led by Him instead of being led by formulas, rituals and other means of applying the Bible to relationships and life.

God has always chosen to be in relationship with believers. Believers receive Him. God is the foundation from which we build relationships.

Respect and Value

Romans 12:18 Amplified Bible says, "If possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone." One aspect of peace is to respect and value people. God created each person in His image whether rich or poor or possessing some other quality. Each person has value and is to be respected. Operating in value and respect will bring more value and respect into our lives.

How to Catch and Keep Friends

As raindrops were pouring from a pale, grey sky earlier this week, I was pouring over the book of Romans chapter 12 for tips to catch and keep friends. My readings got me to thinking and praying broadly about the subject.

Welcoming and living in a wide variety of relationships are not optional for believers. Chantal Sicile-Kira categorizes relationships in her article, "The Transition To Adulthood: Planning Ahead," for the magazine, Autism File, that is applicable to all people. She describes four circles of relationships:

1) The Circle of Intimacy includes those with whom we share our secrets, dreams and values. These are our best friends and are usually family members, but can and should also include others. We know and share a lot about what is going on in each others lives, our thoughts and feelings.We feel safe enough in these relationships to support each other spiritually and emotionally. Jesus encouraged intimate relationships beyond biology. Mark 3:33-35 New Living Translation Bible says, "Jesus replied, “Who is my mother? Who are my brothers?” Then he looked at those around him and said, “Look, these are my mother and brothers. Anyone who does God’s will is my brother and sister and mother.”

2) The Circle of Friendship includes friends or relatives whom we see for occasional social activities, such as for a movie or to eat a meal, but who are not our closest friends. The Bible records that Epaphras and Paul shared some time in jail and time spreading the Gospel, but not with the intensity and intimacy of the relationship between Timothy and Paul.

3) The Circle of Participation includes people who we participate with in our life, such as on the job, business or ministry, our place of worship, schools, sports teams, social clubs and other organizations. This circle contains people who may eventually be in the Circle of Friendship or even the Circle of Intimacy. We can socialize with members of our church, other churches and other groups. Luke 9:49-50 New Living Translation Bible says, "John said to Jesus, “Master, we saw someone using your name to cast out demons, but we told him to stop because he isn’t in our group.” But Jesus said, “Don’t stop him! Anyone who is not against you is for you.”"

4) The Circle of Exchange includes people who are paid to be in our lives, such as medical professionals, teachers, counselors, governmental officials, sales associates, auto mechanics, etc. These people can also be cultivated to move into the Circle of Participation, Circle of Friendship and even the Circle of Intimacy. Everyone is a potential friend/disciple. Matthew 28:18-20 the Message Bible says, "Jesus, undeterred, went right ahead and gave his charge: "God authorized and commanded me to commission you: Go out and train everyone you meet, far and near, in this way of life, marking them by baptism in the threefold name: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Then instruct them in the practice of all I have commanded you. I'll be with you as you do this, day after day after day, right up to the end of the age.""
The circles of exchange and participation are casual relationships. The circle of friendship are comfortable relationships with people who are not involved in the intimate details of our lives. The circle of intimacy contains our confidants.

We can have more than one confidant. While David had Jonathan, Jesus had Peter, James and John.

We can also have multiple same-sex and opposite-sex relationships in the circles of exchange, participation, friendship and intimacy. Many don't have a problem with same-sex friends, but some stumble over the idea of opposite-sex friends especially for married couples. God made the human race female and male. Living in the Holy-Ghost fruit of self-control we can have casual, close and appropriate relationships with both the opposite sex and the same sex. The Apostle Paul had many friendships with women such as Priscilla, Lydia, and Phoebe to name a few. He also had friendships with men.

Having only same-sex friends cripples us. God made us male and female not just for marriage. We learn and are made better people gaining balance and appreciation of difference being raised by a mother and a father. Then we branch out from the family into non-familial relationships where we are designed to continue to grow in balance and appreciation of difference. The Prophetess and Judge Deborah was instrumental to developing the courage, confidence and combat skill of Barak.


Here's some tips plucked primarily from Romans chapter 12 on catching and keeping friends.

1) Accept people without arrogance. Pride refuses to mature and to forgive saying,  "I'm perfect." Humility embraces our unique God-given design along with personal growth and repentance. We all make multiple mistakes throughout life.

African American R&B singer Anita Baker sings in her song "I Apologize," "Lord you should have heard the way he shouted and the way that I screamed . . . I apologize . . .  Because I know I was wrong."

Admitting our wrongs is a sober judgment of ourselves and is loving ourselves and others. When we do someone wrong trying to gloss over it doesn't clean up the mess but often causes it to spread.

In admitting our wrongs we are not rejecting who we are. We are trying to improve. Self-improvement is relationship improvement. God accepts us and works to change us into the fullest likeness of His good self. God gives us His strength to consistently admit our wrongs without losing a positive view of ourselves. Even though believers do some awful things, God thinks we are awesome. God never loses hope in the victory of good over evil. The Apostle Paul wrote most of the New Testament even though before he became an apostle he was a serial killer going around seeking Christians to put in jail and to have sentenced to death.

2) Extensively, enthusiastically, excellently use the special gifts God has given us to build relationships. I had a friend who said his gift was encouragement. However, I ended the relationship because his encouragement was not authentic. We were communicating by email often twice daily, but he never was willing to talk by telephone or meet in person. What was he hiding that was inhibiting him from drawing closer to me? What type of spirit was behind his behavior? His emails seemed to embrace me in warmth, but they never led to the intimacy of spontaneous conversation and in-person engagement. John 6:63 Amplified Bible says, "It is the Spirit Who gives life [He is the Life-giver]; the flesh conveys no benefit whatever [there is no profit in it]. The words (truths) that I have been speaking to you are spirit and life."

3) Cultivate a diverse number of friends of the same sex, opposite sex, same gifts, different gifts, multiple races and relationships in all four circles. The Apostle Paul participated in all types of relationships. Timothy, Titus, Priscilla, Aquila and Barnabas are some members in Paul's Circle of Intimacy. The Apostles Peter and James and Lydia are some members in Paul's Circle of Friendship. Governor Sergius Paulus, Publius, the head of the island of Malta, and his father are some members in Paul's Circle of Participation. Acts 28:8 Amplified Bible says, "And it happened that the father of Publius was sick in bed with recurring attacks of fever and dysentery; and Paul went to see him, and after praying and laying his hands on him, he healed him." Governor Felix, Drusilla, the wife of Governor Felix, King Agrippa, Bernice, the wife of King Agrippa, and Governor Gallio of Achaia province are some members in Paul's Circle of Exchange.

Paul had relationships with men and women, Jews, Greeks and people of other races, believers and nonbelievers. Paul was not a snob, sexist or racist. Paul welcomed everyone while reserving his circle of intimacy for believers which is not discrimination but the wisdom of being closest with people of the same faith and purpose in life. If we try to have intimacy with enemies, then we risk destroying people. Jesus Christ says in Mark 3:25 Amplified Bible, "And if a house is divided (split into factions and rebelling) against itself, that house will not be able to last." Bishop Derek Grier of Grace Church in Dumfries, Virginia, said in the mid-morning 1/1/2013 sermon, "The devil comes in the form of division;" "He comes with strife to destroy unity." Dr. Grier said the devil wants to destroy unity because unity removes limitations; we can do some much more together than by ourselves. He also said that unity amplifies and multiplies.

We like Paul are called to nurture and expand the four circles of relationships, to have relationships with the same sex, the opposite sex, different races and to have a diversity of relationships with people of all types. The Apostle Paul teaches us in 1 Corinthians 11:1 New Living Translation Bible, "And you should imitate me, just as I imitate Christ."

4) Love people authentically. Love is friendly, intentional, consistent and Holy-Ghost empowered to commit through thick and thin times. Romans 12:10 Amplified Bible says, "Love one another with brotherly affection [as members of one family], giving precedence and showing honor to one another." Friendliness helps form, maintain and grow relationships. Neither Christ nor Paul displayed a "Do not disturb me" attitude toward people. Nor did they confuse Jewish culture with Biblical revelation. Christ and Paul tried to connect with the widest possible range of people. 1 Corinthians 9:19-23 the Message Bible says, "Even though I am free of the demands and expectations of everyone, I have voluntarily become a servant to any and all in order to reach a wide range of people: religious, nonreligious, meticulous moralists, loose-living immoralists; the defeated, the demoralized--whoever, I didn't take on their way of life. I kept my bearings in Christ--but I entered their world and tried to experience things from their point of view. I've become just about every sort of servant there is in my attempts to lead those I meet into a God-saved life. I did all this because of the Message. I didn't just want to talk about it; I wanted to be in on it!"

Sometimes we are not honoring people in our relationships because we are jealous and/or envious of them. People will admit to some sins, but jealousy and envy are not the usual ones. Yet they are common ones among siblings, friends, colleagues and other relationships. Cherish and celebrate our gifts and the gifts of others without comparison or covetousness. We are all essential. Romans 12:4-6 the Message Bible says, "In this way we are like the various parts of a human body. Each part gets its meaning from the body as a whole, not the other way around. The body we're talking about is Christ's body of chosen people. Each of us finds our meaning and function as a part of his body. But as a chopped-off finger or cut-off toe we wouldn't amount to much, would we? So since we find ourselves fashioned into all these excellently formed and marvelously functioning parts in Christ's body, let's just go ahead and be what we were made to be, without enviously or pridefully comparing ourselves with each other, or trying to be something we aren't."

African Americans Oprah Winfrey and Gayle King are long-time best friends. Both are in communications, but Oprah is single, never married, mother of a deceased child while Gayle is divorced with two, healthy children. Oprah was raised in poverty. Gayle spent her elementary school years in Ankara, Turkey, with vacations in Paris, Rome and Greece and maid service.

Oprah, the first African-American female billionaire, says she and Gayle, who is a co-anchor of CBS This Morning and an editor-at-large for O, The Oprah Magazine, have overcome jealousy and envy in their more than 30-year friendship by being continually supportive of each other and spending copious amounts of time and attention on their friendship. Oprah bought a full-time nanny for Gayle to help her with her children, Kirby and Will, who are less than one year apart in age. Oprah sees money as a tool that can help others, but if that is all someone wants and expects from the relationships, then they are not really a friend. Money is a relationship-building tool. Luke 16:9 Amplified Bible says, "And I tell you, make friends for yourselves by means of unrighteous mammon (deceitful riches, money, possessions), so that when it fails, they [those you have favored] may receive and welcome you into the everlasting habitations (dwellings)." Gayle says she views Oprah's and the success of those around her as something that also makes her better. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 New Living Translation Bible says, "So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing." We grow together or tear each other apart together.

Some have a false sense of loyalty avoiding participation in other Christian ministries or other relationships. While we should give more time and attention to our marriage and other relationships in our circle of intimacy than our relationship with our dentist and other relationships in our circle of exchange, that doesn't excuse us to focus on our marriage to the exclusion of all other relationships. Showing authentic love comes with spending time and attention on a variety of relationships. Jesus was confidants with Peter, James and John. He also socialized with casual acquaintances like the Samaritan woman who had five-husbands, a current live-in lover and probably a blended household of no-telling how many children..

5) Serve God through serving people. Friends help friends in a wide variety of ways. A story talks about a man taken out of the earth realm and into a trip of hell and heaven. The angels showed him a room in hell with a group of hungry people trying to eat dinner. They never did eat because the spoons they were using were longer than their arms and no one helped them to overcome the obstacle. Then the angels showed him a room in heaven. The man was shocked to see a similar scene of hungry people trying to eat dinner with spoons longer than their arms. Yet they had happy faces and were enjoying their meal because they helped each other overcome the obstacle.

It's natural to serve self. It's spiritual to serve self and others. Routinely examine our behavior asking, "Who does this serve?"

6) Pursue hospitality. Welcome strangers and friends. Seek to make strangers friends and friends closer friends. Creativity can cultivate relationships. In the early 1400s the ruler of the East African port city Malinda sent a personal envoy with a giraffe as a present to the Ming dynasty emperor in China. The giraffe was a big hit. Maybe you can't make a splash by bringing a giraffe, but you can put together a backyard barbeque with a special theme for the families of your children's friends and others, or you can do something else with simple flair.

God meant for believers to do the spectacular in our individual way. Jesus Christ says in John 14:12 Amplified Bible, "I assure you, most solemnly I tell you, if anyone steadfastly believes in Me, he will himself be able to do the things that I do; and he will do even greater things than these, because I go to the Father."

People who are one-dimensional and/or refuse to try novel ways make it difficult for people to stay in relationship with them and to attract new relationships in the circles of friendship and intimacy.

Some spouses drain the life out of their marriage and other relationships by allowing themselves to become dull. Meanwhile plenty of singles and married people excel at exceeding people's expectations. The immoral ones are waiting to suck in spouses in dull marriages and dull singles looking for excitement. Proverbs 5:3 Amplified Bible says, "For the lips of a loose woman drip honey as a honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil."

Pleasure is not sinful nor is using honey to catch and keep friends. Motives make a difference in determining the difference between good and evil. Christian, African American Jazz singer Carla Cook sings in "It's All About Love," "You can catch more flies with honey." God is pleasure. Yes, your eyes are not tricking you; you read that right. God is pleasure. David writes in Psalm 16:11 Amplified Bible, "You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy, at Your right hand there are pleasures forevermore."

Some are bubbly with great ideas about how to attract people, but they rarely follow through. “The vision must be followed by the venture. It is not enough to stare up the steps - we must step up the stairs,” says Vance Havner. God is more than a dreamer; He's a doer and likes doers. If you want to catch and keep relationships, chase people. Hebrews 11:6 Amplified Bible says, "But without faith it is impossible to please and be satisfactory to Him. For whoever would come near to God must [necessarily] believe that God exists and that He is the rewarder of those who earnestly and diligently seek Him [out]."

Sometimes we bomb in our efforts to catch and keep people. Don't worry. Cooperate with God to learn and to correct the error of our ways. Proverbs 24:16 Amplified Bible says, "For a righteous man falls seven times and rises again, but the wicked are overthrown by calamity."

7) Be sensitive to and live in the emotions and actions needed for the situation. Romans 12:15 New Living Translation Bible says, "Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep."

My son, Rafael, has lots of energy and is full of joy. He likes to bounce on his bed and in the chair he sits on amidst our balcony garden. Rafael recently got a new mattress because his old one had a crater in it due to his bouncing on his bed. I would like to preserve his enthusiasm and our finances, so I put a chair like the one in our garden in his bedroom and explained that he can bounce on that instead of his bed.

8) Turn enemies into friends. Abraham Lincoln said, "I do not like that man. I must get to know him better."

Watch out that self doesn't become our enemy. One of the top strategies of Satan is to manipulate people to get us to turn on our self. Joseph Cotten tells Ingrid Bergman in the movie Gaslight, "You're not going out of your mind. You're slowly and systematically being driven out of your mind."

Insanity is ineffective thinking. One way Satan tries to manipulate people is through anger. Feeling anger is not a sin for it can be a signal of being mistreated. Holding onto anger is where sin enters. Holding onto anger accompanies losing control of our thoughts and emotions. When God's goodness doesn't control us, then the evil of sin does. Sin is a slave master. Peace is power. As believers we have the mind of God the Son Jesus Christ and can use it to slay Satan by refusing to stay upset.

Peace is not passive. In the 1900s Mahatma Gandhi was mad that the British were denying independence to the people of India and monopolizing many Indian industries. Gandhi developed satyagraha which is civil disobedience through peaceful pushing for truth. Gandhi's methods were used by Martin Luther King Jr. to peacefully push civil rights for Africans Americans and others in the United States. Many who were enemies to the ideas of Gandhi and King initially were won over by their peaceful protest.  

Please share your experiences catching and keeping friends by leaving an on-line comment, tweeting with me via my Twitter.com name "Michelelove30" and Google's G+. Abraham Lincoln says, "The better part of one's life consists of his friendships."