How is it possible to kill by abortion more than 336 million people and to sterilize more than 222 million people since 1971 in China? How is it possible to kill by abortion more than 55 million people in America since 1973 and to sterilize more than 60,000? One part of the answer is that it's necessary to "educate" as many people as possible to think that evil is good.
Satan, the devil, sometimes pretends to be gentle and good to confuse people into embracing evil as good.
Recently I was reading a book that described China's one-child policy as "highly effective." A confused mind describes as "highly effective" killing baby boys and baby girls via abortion and sterilizing women and men all accompanied with government compulsion on parents to pay for these acts.
1 Corinthians 13:7 Amplified Bible says, "Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening]." Love does not focus on sin and difficult circumstances. Love focuses on God first then people. A Twi African proverb says, "Love is the greatest of all virtues." Matthew 22:36-40 Amplified Bible says, "Teacher, which kind of commandment is great and important (the principal kind) in the Law? [Some commandments are light—which are heavy?] And He replied to him, You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind (intellect). This is the great (most important, principal) and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as [you do] yourself. These two commandments sum up and upon them depend all the Law and the Prophets."
God is Love. Obey Love. Disobey the devil. Love sees the potential in people. The devil sees people as worthless and hopeless; the devil seeks opportunities to create problems for people, accuse them of sin and kill them.
God does not ignore sin and difficulties. God sees all reality and is still willing and able to love. Before the healing of a son with mental and physical disabilities Mark 9:23 Amplified Bible says, "And Jesus said, [You say to Me], If You can do anything? [Why,] all things can be (are possible) to him who believes!"
When a father brought his son who had mental and physical disabilities to God the Son Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ did not sterilize, starve or separate the father and/or son. Instead Jesus Christ healed the son who had mental and physical disabilities and didn't hold his sins or his father's sins and difficult circumstances against them.
A Spanish saying is, "God will provide the means." God is a healer and a problem solver, not a people accuser and people killer. Imitate God. Ephesians 4:3-5:2 Amplified Bible says, "Be eager and strive earnestly to guard and keep the harmony and oneness of [and produced by] the Spirit in the binding power of peace. Therefore be imitators of God [copy Him and follow His example], as well-beloved children [imitate their father]. And walk in love, [esteeming and delighting in one another] as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us, a slain offering and sacrifice to God [for you, so that it became] a sweet fragrance."
Jesus Christ died and rose from the dead in three days getting back all that Satan stole from people. Satan has no potential for good. Jesus Christ is sterilizing, starving and separating Satan and his kingdom of darkness, so that God's love and goodness will reign in all the universe. What are some ways you on purpose focus on love instead of sin and difficult circumstances? Write to:
Michele F. Jackson
P. O. Box 2106
Woodbridge, Virginia 22195
Follow Michele F. Jackson on http://www.Twitter.com/Michelelove30.
Showing posts with label Sin. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sin. Show all posts
Monday, August 12, 2013
Friday, July 19, 2013
Kill That Beast
God makes it simple for us to enter into a relationship with Him. God did all the work. We just receive Him. John 1:12-13 Amplified Bible says, "But to as many as did receive and welcome Him, He gave the authority (power, privilege, right) to become the children of God, that is, to those who believe in (adhere to, trust in, and rely on) His name—Who owe their birth neither to bloods nor to the will of the flesh [that of physical impulse] nor to the will of man [that of a natural father], but to God. [They are born of God!]"
Is it simple to have a relationship with you? A Twi African proverb says, "Love is the greatest of all virtues." 1 Corinthians 13:5 Amplified Bible says about love, "It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong]."
God loves people of all sexes, ages, races, ethnicity and abilities. He wants us to do likewise.
The human body is a work of divine art. God starts human life from sperm and egg uniting ideally through merry, marital sexual relations.
Don't kill unborn girls and unborn boys through abortion. "Kill that beast. Let your new creature appear" ("Kill That" song on CD Kingdom Business 4 by Christian Rapper Canton Jones.) Colossians 3:5-10 Amplified Bible says, "So kill (deaden, deprive of power) the evil desire lurking in your members [those animal impulses and all that is earthly in you that is employed in sin]: sexual vice, impurity, sensual appetites, unholy desires, and all greed and covetousness, for that is idolatry (the deifying of self and other created things instead of God). It is on account of these [very sins] that the [holy] anger of God is ever coming upon the sons of disobedience (those who are obstinately opposed to the divine will), Among whom you also once walked, when you were living in and addicted to [such practices]. But now put away and rid yourselves [completely] of all these things: anger, rage, bad feeling toward others, curses and slander, and foulmouthed abuse and shameful utterances from your lips! Do not lie to one another, for you have stripped off the old (unregenerate) self with its evil practices, And have clothed yourselves with the new [spiritual self], which is [ever in the process of being] renewed and remolded into [fuller and more perfect knowledge upon] knowledge after the image (the likeness) of Him Who created it."
A Japanese proverb says, "Do quickly what is good." Now is the time to kill that beast and let your new creature appear. Waiting for any other time is a deception.
A Chinese proverb says, "To plug the ears while stealing the bell" and means "to deceive oneself." What are some ways people deceive themselves in trying to pursue loving relationships? Write to:
Michele F. Jackson
P.O. Box 2106
Woodbridge, Virginia 22195
Follow Michele F. Jackson on http://www.Twitter.com/Michelelove30.
Is it simple to have a relationship with you? A Twi African proverb says, "Love is the greatest of all virtues." 1 Corinthians 13:5 Amplified Bible says about love, "It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong]."
God loves people of all sexes, ages, races, ethnicity and abilities. He wants us to do likewise.
The human body is a work of divine art. God starts human life from sperm and egg uniting ideally through merry, marital sexual relations.
Don't kill unborn girls and unborn boys through abortion. "Kill that beast. Let your new creature appear" ("Kill That" song on CD Kingdom Business 4 by Christian Rapper Canton Jones.) Colossians 3:5-10 Amplified Bible says, "So kill (deaden, deprive of power) the evil desire lurking in your members [those animal impulses and all that is earthly in you that is employed in sin]: sexual vice, impurity, sensual appetites, unholy desires, and all greed and covetousness, for that is idolatry (the deifying of self and other created things instead of God). It is on account of these [very sins] that the [holy] anger of God is ever coming upon the sons of disobedience (those who are obstinately opposed to the divine will), Among whom you also once walked, when you were living in and addicted to [such practices]. But now put away and rid yourselves [completely] of all these things: anger, rage, bad feeling toward others, curses and slander, and foulmouthed abuse and shameful utterances from your lips! Do not lie to one another, for you have stripped off the old (unregenerate) self with its evil practices, And have clothed yourselves with the new [spiritual self], which is [ever in the process of being] renewed and remolded into [fuller and more perfect knowledge upon] knowledge after the image (the likeness) of Him Who created it."
A Japanese proverb says, "Do quickly what is good." Now is the time to kill that beast and let your new creature appear. Waiting for any other time is a deception.
A Chinese proverb says, "To plug the ears while stealing the bell" and means "to deceive oneself." What are some ways people deceive themselves in trying to pursue loving relationships? Write to:
Michele F. Jackson
P.O. Box 2106
Woodbridge, Virginia 22195
Follow Michele F. Jackson on http://www.Twitter.com/Michelelove30.
Monday, January 21, 2013
Novel Sex
Trying new things can be good. Solomon's Shulammite wife strove to try new types of lovemaking with Solomon. Together they enjoyed the old ways of mating while embracing the new. Novelty can be exciting, edifying and exquisite.
Our God is the Creator. He created sex and sexuality. We are made in God's image. We are also creators.
Some novelty is destructive; more than one million Americans went to a swingers club in 2011. Instead of swapping sex partners creative marital monogamy involves consistently growing in ways to make a spouse's life better. Figuring out new ways to bring sexual pleasure and other pleasure to a spouse is a ministry, a responsibility and a loving, beautiful joy.
Solomon's wife enjoyed getting naked in nature with Solomon. She says to Solomon in Song of Solomon 7:11-12 New Living Translation Bible, "Come, my love, let us go out to the fields and spend the night among the wildflowers. Let us get up early and go to the vineyards to see if the grapevines have budded, if the blossoms have opened, and if the pomegranates have bloomed. There I will give you my love. There the mandrakes give off their fragrance, and the finest fruits are at our door, new delights as well as old, which I have saved for you, my lover."
God built our beautiful bodies for love. Spouses, have fun customizing the missionary and downward rear entry. Strip off the No es posible attitude and the bad body image. Rear-entry vaginal sex is not immoral. Experiment with many of the hundreds of sexual positions and sensual sensations.
Some in our parents generation were taught and communicated to us that oral sex is depraved, but nothing in the Bible prohibits oral sex. Actually, the Bible encourages it. Sometimes we have taboos that God does not possess. Solomon's Shulammite wife says about Solomon in Song of Solomon 2:3 New Living Translation Bible, "Like the finest apple tree in the orchard is my lover among other young men. I sit in his delightful shade and taste his delicious fruit." Of course, oral sex is not just for a wife to give to her husband. A husband and wife can give each other oral sex even at the same time! They may even have simultaneous orgasms by licking, kissing, sucking, touching each others penis and vagina lying side by side.
Orgasms outside of sexual intercourse can be had in a variety of ways. Some say they can think themselves into orgasms. If you need touch, try creating a love tunnel for your husband's penis with your breasts, hands and/or thighs.
The Bible doesn't seem to say anything for or against anal sex. Anal sex seems to fall in the category of using the wise mind of Christ. Anal play seems fine, but anal penetration is it really safe and sanitary? Please leave an on-line comment about anal sex from a Biblical perspective.
With over 500 ways to have vaginal intercourse a marital couple might never get around to the anal-sex issue. Also many will not even come close to trying 500 sexual positions, and that's okay. A great marital sex life is not based on using multiple sexual positions.
Spouses, learn each other. Some people need more privacy than others for marital lovemaking. Some need less privacy. In the movie Dances With Wolves the wife of the Sioux holy man is on top making delicious while family and friends are sleeping in the same room!
Play games like "Hide and Go Freak," Manos Arriba (Hands Up) or invent your own game.
Men may think more about sex than women generally, but women have the potential to have more orgasms in a lovemaking session than men generally. The National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior reports that the more sexual positions a woman engages in with a man during a lovemaking session the greater the potential for orgasms. Many women love to shop and possess a wide variety of clothes, shoes, accessories and other items. Like we like variety in our shopping, we like variety in our sexual relationship. A husband going into his wife or a wife mounting her husband at various angles creates different sensations. Please leave an on-line comment about your favorite sexual positions.
Sexual fantasies about our spouse can be used to enhance a couple's sexual life. Talk to God to stop fantasies about people other than our spouse.
Tender and talented marital lovemaking includes more than oral sex or a husband going into his wife or a wife mounting her husband. Solomon and his wife enjoyed each others full body. Intimacy is:
Intentional,
Nurturing,
Talking,
Integration,
Mating,
Adoration,
Compassion,
Yearning.
'"Women, this might surprise you, but even more than your husband wants to have sex with you for his own sexual relief, the truth is, he wants to please you even more than he wants to be pleasured. It might seem like it's all about him, but what he really wants, emotionally, is to see how much you enjoy the pleasure he can give you. If he fails to do that, for any reason, he'll end up feeling inadequate, lonely, and unloved. Most of us men want to be our wives' heroes," says Dr. Kevin Leman in his book, Sheet Music Uncovering the Secrets of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage.
Bible-living, Christian spouses shouldn't have a bad sex life. Christian Minister and Civil Rights Activist Martin Luther King, Jr., wrote in his "Letter from Birmingham Jail," "There can be no deep disappointment where there is not deep love." God commands us to figure out how to love people. Galatians 5:14 New Living Translation Bible says, "For the whole law can be summed up in this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”" Please leave a comment if your spouse likes to be loved in a way that is different from the way you like to be loved.
For the most part, believers are suppose to give, receive and feel love like Donna Summer sang in her song, "I Feel Love." If your relationships aren't so good, and you are not feeling love, then sin is present and needs to brought before God to be forgiven and stopped.
While God designed partner sex for married couples only, God designed both spouses and singles to celebrate their sexuality. Inner beauty is holy, and so is looking good on the outside. Sex and sexuality are a celebration of life. God is Life. Solomon says to his loved one in Song of Solomon 1:10 New Living Translation Bible, "How lovely are your cheeks; your earrings set them afire! How lovely is your neck, enhanced by a string of jewels."
Please leave an on-line comment sharing novel, Biblical, beautiful ways to express sex and sexuality.
Our God is the Creator. He created sex and sexuality. We are made in God's image. We are also creators.
Some novelty is destructive; more than one million Americans went to a swingers club in 2011. Instead of swapping sex partners creative marital monogamy involves consistently growing in ways to make a spouse's life better. Figuring out new ways to bring sexual pleasure and other pleasure to a spouse is a ministry, a responsibility and a loving, beautiful joy.
Solomon's wife enjoyed getting naked in nature with Solomon. She says to Solomon in Song of Solomon 7:11-12 New Living Translation Bible, "Come, my love, let us go out to the fields and spend the night among the wildflowers. Let us get up early and go to the vineyards to see if the grapevines have budded, if the blossoms have opened, and if the pomegranates have bloomed. There I will give you my love. There the mandrakes give off their fragrance, and the finest fruits are at our door, new delights as well as old, which I have saved for you, my lover."
God built our beautiful bodies for love. Spouses, have fun customizing the missionary and downward rear entry. Strip off the No es posible attitude and the bad body image. Rear-entry vaginal sex is not immoral. Experiment with many of the hundreds of sexual positions and sensual sensations.
Some in our parents generation were taught and communicated to us that oral sex is depraved, but nothing in the Bible prohibits oral sex. Actually, the Bible encourages it. Sometimes we have taboos that God does not possess. Solomon's Shulammite wife says about Solomon in Song of Solomon 2:3 New Living Translation Bible, "Like the finest apple tree in the orchard is my lover among other young men. I sit in his delightful shade and taste his delicious fruit." Of course, oral sex is not just for a wife to give to her husband. A husband and wife can give each other oral sex even at the same time! They may even have simultaneous orgasms by licking, kissing, sucking, touching each others penis and vagina lying side by side.
Orgasms outside of sexual intercourse can be had in a variety of ways. Some say they can think themselves into orgasms. If you need touch, try creating a love tunnel for your husband's penis with your breasts, hands and/or thighs.
The Bible doesn't seem to say anything for or against anal sex. Anal sex seems to fall in the category of using the wise mind of Christ. Anal play seems fine, but anal penetration is it really safe and sanitary? Please leave an on-line comment about anal sex from a Biblical perspective.
With over 500 ways to have vaginal intercourse a marital couple might never get around to the anal-sex issue. Also many will not even come close to trying 500 sexual positions, and that's okay. A great marital sex life is not based on using multiple sexual positions.
Spouses, learn each other. Some people need more privacy than others for marital lovemaking. Some need less privacy. In the movie Dances With Wolves the wife of the Sioux holy man is on top making delicious while family and friends are sleeping in the same room!
Play games like "Hide and Go Freak," Manos Arriba (Hands Up) or invent your own game.
Men may think more about sex than women generally, but women have the potential to have more orgasms in a lovemaking session than men generally. The National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior reports that the more sexual positions a woman engages in with a man during a lovemaking session the greater the potential for orgasms. Many women love to shop and possess a wide variety of clothes, shoes, accessories and other items. Like we like variety in our shopping, we like variety in our sexual relationship. A husband going into his wife or a wife mounting her husband at various angles creates different sensations. Please leave an on-line comment about your favorite sexual positions.
Sexual fantasies about our spouse can be used to enhance a couple's sexual life. Talk to God to stop fantasies about people other than our spouse.
Tender and talented marital lovemaking includes more than oral sex or a husband going into his wife or a wife mounting her husband. Solomon and his wife enjoyed each others full body. Intimacy is:
Intentional,
Nurturing,
Talking,
Integration,
Mating,
Adoration,
Compassion,
Yearning.
'"Women, this might surprise you, but even more than your husband wants to have sex with you for his own sexual relief, the truth is, he wants to please you even more than he wants to be pleasured. It might seem like it's all about him, but what he really wants, emotionally, is to see how much you enjoy the pleasure he can give you. If he fails to do that, for any reason, he'll end up feeling inadequate, lonely, and unloved. Most of us men want to be our wives' heroes," says Dr. Kevin Leman in his book, Sheet Music Uncovering the Secrets of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage.
Bible-living, Christian spouses shouldn't have a bad sex life. Christian Minister and Civil Rights Activist Martin Luther King, Jr., wrote in his "Letter from Birmingham Jail," "There can be no deep disappointment where there is not deep love." God commands us to figure out how to love people. Galatians 5:14 New Living Translation Bible says, "For the whole law can be summed up in this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”" Please leave a comment if your spouse likes to be loved in a way that is different from the way you like to be loved.
For the most part, believers are suppose to give, receive and feel love like Donna Summer sang in her song, "I Feel Love." If your relationships aren't so good, and you are not feeling love, then sin is present and needs to brought before God to be forgiven and stopped.
While God designed partner sex for married couples only, God designed both spouses and singles to celebrate their sexuality. Inner beauty is holy, and so is looking good on the outside. Sex and sexuality are a celebration of life. God is Life. Solomon says to his loved one in Song of Solomon 1:10 New Living Translation Bible, "How lovely are your cheeks; your earrings set them afire! How lovely is your neck, enhanced by a string of jewels."
Please leave an on-line comment sharing novel, Biblical, beautiful ways to express sex and sexuality.
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Second-Class Christian Citizens?
Are non-virgins second-class
Christian citizens compared to virgins? No! Someone who has had one or
more sexual partners is not a second-class Christian or a second-best
marriage partner.
While a virgin has not sinned in having sexual relations with another human being, a virgin has sinned in some ways. Virgins and non-virgins have sinned in multiple ways. Romans 3:10 Amplified Bible says, "As it is written, None is righteous, just and truthful and upright and conscientious, no, not one." The solution to a lack of righteousness is offered to virgins and non-virgins in Romans 6:23 Amplified Bible which says, "For the wages which sin pays is death, but the [bountiful] free gift of God is eternal life through (in union with) Jesus Christ our Lord."
When considering someone to marry we don't want to disqualify a person based on being a virgin or non-virgin. What is much more important is marrying a person who has received an eternal relationship with God the Father, God the Son Jesus Christ and God the Holy Ghost. While many are concerned about the chronological age of a spouse, what is more important is to be and to marry someone spiritually mature; someone whose relationship with God is deep like the earth's deepest lakes of Lake Tanganyika in Africa and Lake Baikal in Siberia, Russia; someone who constantly chases God, and is consequently constantly improving.
A person can be a virgin or non-virgin and still be spiritually immature. A good marriage is the fellowship of two spiritually mature Christians who are continuously cooperating with God to change into His likeness.
Many people receive Christ, but refuse to grow in their relationship with Christ, themselves and other people. The Bible gives us the blueprint for living. Joshua 1:8 Amplified Bible says, "This Book of the Law shall not depart out of your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, that you may observe and do according to all that is written in it. For then you shall make your way prosperous, and then you shall deal wisely and have good success." Some people want to succeed, but they are not willing to do what it takes to succeed. Brian Tracy writes in his book, No Excuses! The Power of Self-Discipline 21 Ways to Achieve Lasting Happiness and Success, "One of the most important requirements for success, once you have decided what it is that you want, is the quality of willingness. Successful people are willing to pay the price, whatever it is and for as long as it takes, until they achieve the results they desire. Everyone wants to be successful . . . . But most people are not willing to pay the price. Occasionally, they may be wiling to pay part of the price, but they are not willing to pay the whole price. They always hold back. They always have some excuse or rationalization for not disciplining themselves to do everything that they need to do to achieve their goals."
Being a virgin before marriage may indicate that a person has some love of God. John 14:15 Amplified Bible says, "If you [really] love Me, you will keep (obey) My commands." Virgins have been obedient to one aspect of Exodus 20:14 the Message Bible which requires us to practice, "No adultery."
A non-virgin may also love God irregardless of having sex outside of marriage once or thousands of times. Some non-virgins have sinned sexually, received the forgiveness, transformation and love of God and have been walking in beautiful, Biblical, sexual balance for a while.
God does not consider virgins more spiritual or worthy or better people than non-virgins. God offers His love to everyone. God inspired the Apostle Paul to say in Galatians 3:28 New Living Translation Bible, "There is no longer Jew or Gentile, slave or free, male and female. For you are all one in Christ Jesus."
In some parts of the globe a woman can be killed if she is not a virgin before marriage. Hymenoplasty surgery to attempt to restore a broken hymen is routinely performed in parts of the world, such as Muslim countries and other places. In Japan hymenoplasty is called "virginity rebirth." Jesus Christ does not require hymenoplasty and other mutilation of our bodies to be holy.
If you are a non-virgin who has sought the forgiveness, transformation and love of God to empower you to celebrate single sexuality and to celebrate sexual relations inside of marriage, but find yourself struggling with your self-worth, shame, fear, guilt or something else, keep on asking God to help you to fully receive His love. God views us as individual, priceless treasures. He wants us to have the same view of ourselves as He has of us.
If you are a virgin who looks down on non-virgins, repent of being judgmental, condemning, haughty and self-righteous like many of the religious leaders during the time of Jesus Christ's earthly ministry. Jesus Christ tells a story in Luke 18:10-14 Amplified Bible which says, "Two men went up into the temple [enclosure] to pray, the one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee took his stand ostentatiously and began to pray thus before and with himself: God, I thank You that I am not like the rest of men--extortioners (robbers), swindlers [unrighteous in heart and life], adulterers--or even like this tax collector here. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I gain. But the tax collector, [merely] standing at a distance, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but kept striking his breast, saying, O God, be favorable (be gracious, be merciful) to me, the especially wicked sinner that I am! I tell you, this man went down to his home justified (forgiven and made upright and in right standing with God), rather than the other man; for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but he who humbles himself will be exalted."
When we have received
a lot of the love of God, we are able to give out a lot of the love of
God. Having received the love of God, non-virgins will not feel bad
about themselves and/or envy virgins; also virgins will not feel
superior to non-virgins or envy non-virgins. God takes all of our sins
and works them out for His glory and our good. International practical
Bible teacher Joyce Meyer was repeatedly raped by her father as a child and as an
adolescent. As a young adult she went through a divorce. Later she
married Dave Meyer, and later still together they have a Christian
ministry potentially impacting 4.5 billion. Luci Swindoll is a single who
has an international Christian ministry and writes in her book, I Married Adventure,
"It's daring to be curious about the unknown, to dream big dreams, to
live outside prescribed boxes, to take risks, and above all, daring to
investigate the way we live until we discover the deepest treasured
purpose of why we are here."
Whether we are a non-virgin or virgin, if we have received God and are continuously seeking to mature in our relationship with God and people, then celebrate who we are just as we are.
While a virgin has not sinned in having sexual relations with another human being, a virgin has sinned in some ways. Virgins and non-virgins have sinned in multiple ways. Romans 3:10 Amplified Bible says, "As it is written, None is righteous, just and truthful and upright and conscientious, no, not one." The solution to a lack of righteousness is offered to virgins and non-virgins in Romans 6:23 Amplified Bible which says, "For the wages which sin pays is death, but the [bountiful] free gift of God is eternal life through (in union with) Jesus Christ our Lord."
When considering someone to marry we don't want to disqualify a person based on being a virgin or non-virgin. What is much more important is marrying a person who has received an eternal relationship with God the Father, God the Son Jesus Christ and God the Holy Ghost. While many are concerned about the chronological age of a spouse, what is more important is to be and to marry someone spiritually mature; someone whose relationship with God is deep like the earth's deepest lakes of Lake Tanganyika in Africa and Lake Baikal in Siberia, Russia; someone who constantly chases God, and is consequently constantly improving.
A person can be a virgin or non-virgin and still be spiritually immature. A good marriage is the fellowship of two spiritually mature Christians who are continuously cooperating with God to change into His likeness.
Many people receive Christ, but refuse to grow in their relationship with Christ, themselves and other people. The Bible gives us the blueprint for living. Joshua 1:8 Amplified Bible says, "This Book of the Law shall not depart out of your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, that you may observe and do according to all that is written in it. For then you shall make your way prosperous, and then you shall deal wisely and have good success." Some people want to succeed, but they are not willing to do what it takes to succeed. Brian Tracy writes in his book, No Excuses! The Power of Self-Discipline 21 Ways to Achieve Lasting Happiness and Success, "One of the most important requirements for success, once you have decided what it is that you want, is the quality of willingness. Successful people are willing to pay the price, whatever it is and for as long as it takes, until they achieve the results they desire. Everyone wants to be successful . . . . But most people are not willing to pay the price. Occasionally, they may be wiling to pay part of the price, but they are not willing to pay the whole price. They always hold back. They always have some excuse or rationalization for not disciplining themselves to do everything that they need to do to achieve their goals."
Being a virgin before marriage may indicate that a person has some love of God. John 14:15 Amplified Bible says, "If you [really] love Me, you will keep (obey) My commands." Virgins have been obedient to one aspect of Exodus 20:14 the Message Bible which requires us to practice, "No adultery."
A non-virgin may also love God irregardless of having sex outside of marriage once or thousands of times. Some non-virgins have sinned sexually, received the forgiveness, transformation and love of God and have been walking in beautiful, Biblical, sexual balance for a while.
God does not consider virgins more spiritual or worthy or better people than non-virgins. God offers His love to everyone. God inspired the Apostle Paul to say in Galatians 3:28 New Living Translation Bible, "There is no longer Jew or Gentile, slave or free, male and female. For you are all one in Christ Jesus."
In some parts of the globe a woman can be killed if she is not a virgin before marriage. Hymenoplasty surgery to attempt to restore a broken hymen is routinely performed in parts of the world, such as Muslim countries and other places. In Japan hymenoplasty is called "virginity rebirth." Jesus Christ does not require hymenoplasty and other mutilation of our bodies to be holy.
If you are a non-virgin who has sought the forgiveness, transformation and love of God to empower you to celebrate single sexuality and to celebrate sexual relations inside of marriage, but find yourself struggling with your self-worth, shame, fear, guilt or something else, keep on asking God to help you to fully receive His love. God views us as individual, priceless treasures. He wants us to have the same view of ourselves as He has of us.
If you are a virgin who looks down on non-virgins, repent of being judgmental, condemning, haughty and self-righteous like many of the religious leaders during the time of Jesus Christ's earthly ministry. Jesus Christ tells a story in Luke 18:10-14 Amplified Bible which says, "Two men went up into the temple [enclosure] to pray, the one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee took his stand ostentatiously and began to pray thus before and with himself: God, I thank You that I am not like the rest of men--extortioners (robbers), swindlers [unrighteous in heart and life], adulterers--or even like this tax collector here. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I gain. But the tax collector, [merely] standing at a distance, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but kept striking his breast, saying, O God, be favorable (be gracious, be merciful) to me, the especially wicked sinner that I am! I tell you, this man went down to his home justified (forgiven and made upright and in right standing with God), rather than the other man; for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but he who humbles himself will be exalted."
If
you are a virgin envying a non-virgin, repent. Never envy sinful
behavior. Sin hurts multiple people in multiple ways whether we see the
pain or not.
Most people are not virgins when the marry. However, 73 percent of non-virgins say sex inside of marriage is better than sex outside of marriage.
Most people are not virgins when the marry. However, 73 percent of non-virgins say sex inside of marriage is better than sex outside of marriage.
Whether we are a non-virgin or virgin, if we have received God and are continuously seeking to mature in our relationship with God and people, then celebrate who we are just as we are.
Thursday, January 17, 2013
10 Ways to Be Irresistible
God is irresistible. Are you? Check yourself against the following 10 irresistible qualities plucked from the Bible book of Colossians where the Apostle Paul pours out praise for God the Son Jesus Christ and encourages us to lean our entire personality on Him.
1) Be a people magnet. It doesn't matter if we are an introvert or an extrovert. Irresistible people connect with other people cultivating the God in believers and introducing Him to others.
We usually first learn to be people magnets by being parented by people magnets. Mother Teresa said, "Try to put in the hearts of your children a love for home. Make them long to be with their families. So much sin could be avoided if our people really loved their homes."
Love is not natural. Christ in us gives us the strength to make the choices to love hour by hour and day by day. He teaches us to cultivate an inner life focused on finding detailed and varied ways to please God and people.
God designed for children to come out of the love of God and spouse. A marriage to God the Father, God the Son Jesus Christ and God the Holy Ghost and to each other produced the Palmer siblings, one of whom is named Keke. African American Keke Palmer, who starred in the movie Akeelah and the Bee, says that her parents introduced her to God and helped her to form a good relationship with God that extended to loving herself and other people.
Pampering ourselves, our marriage, family and friendships with time and attention need not be about spoiling people but rather serving everyone to be their best and to live their best possible life.
Spending little time and attention on our relationships guarantees disconnection and if not corrected often leads to dissolution.
2) Cultivate confidence in Christ in all areas of life. Emotional and other types of instability and insecurity are areas where our understanding and belief in God are weak. Sometimes we may feel, "I'm not loveable;" "I'm unworthy;" and other soul destroying ways. Our feelings are often a product of our self-talk or in response to the way someone is treating us.
God loves us and forgives us of all our sins and all the sins of others. No Biblical reason exists not to love ourselves and other people. When we feel unlovable, unworthy or some other unappreciative way, it's because of sin. Talk to God about it. Get it straightened out. Problems don't go away on their own. They have to be dealt with.
If we are not receiving the love of God, then where love hasn't reached, it cannot be given out. We are designed by God to give out love in overflowing abundance. Jesus Christ says in John 13:34-35 the Message Bible, "Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other."
God wants us to be clear about loving Him, ourselves and others. Ephesians 5:17 Amplified Bible says, "Therefore do not be vague and thoughtless and foolish, but understanding and firmly grasping what the will of the Lord is." Vague people do not live in victory. They are not using time effectively. "El vago trabaja doble." ("The vague works double.")
The vague are susceptible to soaking in the beliefs and attitudes of others instead of being wielded by God to sway others with the love and goodness of God. The vague are nothing like Viktor Frankl. Adolph Hitler's Gestapo arrested this 26-year-old Jewish psychiatrist in Vienna, Austria, and forced him into a concentration camp. Month in and month out without the end in sight, Frankly worked under the huge smokestacks that belched out black carbon monoxide from the incinerators where his father, mother, sister and wife had been cremated. Each day Frankl hoped for a few slivers of carrots or peas in the daily bowl of soup. Nevertheless, the extreme Eastern European cold couldn't stop Frankl from getting up an hour earlier than usual to wrap his feet and legs in scrap burlap and wire to protect them from frostbite. When Frankl was called for inquisition, he stood naked in the center of a white light while men in shiny boots hour after hour assailed him with questions and accusations trying to break him down with every accusing lie they could think of. Already they had taken his wife, his family, his writing, his clothes, his wedding ring and everything else of material value. But in the midst of this barrage of questions, God flashed an idea across Frankl's mind: "They have taken from me everything I have--except the power to choose my own attitude."
As believers not even the Gestapo should be able to persuade us to adopt evil attitudes because we have a powerful resource living on the inside. 1 John 4:4 Amplified Bible says, "Little children, you are of God [you belong to Him] and have [already] defeated and overcome them [the agents of the antichrist], because He Who lives in you is greater (mightier) than he who is in the world."
3) Refuse to be a slave to impulses. Conduct a careful, orderly, thoughtful way of life that examines impulses against the teachings in the Bible and chooses that which is in line with the Word.
Leaning on God is not passivity. God conquered the chaos and created the Garden of Eden. Believers are conquerors like God. We make small choices all throughout the day, day after day, that will eventually produce positive, purposeful plants of truth and other things that are good or weeds of wickedness. Few infidelities start one day out of the blue. Most infidelities are the creeping vines of complacency that overgrew a previously cultivated garden of love.
Some experience infidelity as anticipation and exhilaration from the secrecy, the forbidden sex, the idea that someone really gets us and is willing and eager to fulfill our fantasies. Meanwhile all the potency of sexuality and other sensuality was available in the marriage if we had aggressively and consistently cultivated the time and attention necessary to have a strong, sublime marriage. To know someone and to be known by someone deeply is a spiritual, mental and physical endeavor that does not happen by accident and without a great deal of prayer and practice. When we say, "I do," it doesn't mean, "I'm done working on making sure our relationship stays well watered and wonderful."
Some of the simplest things start great relationships and help them to keep going well. George Foreman, a Christian minister, husband, father of 10 children, African American, entrepreneur and championship boxer, says, in his sermon "The Power of a Smile," "All of us can get up out of that bed every day and make this world a better place by just smiling . . . . We all can be nice."
Mary Landis and Judson Landis write in their book Building a Successful Marriage, "The most important characteristic of a marriageable person is the habit of happiness." Researchers from the University of Virginia’s National Marriage Project recently released the latest “State of Our Unions” report. The December 11, 2012, issue of The New York Times Magazine says the National Marriage Project examined the role of generosity in the marriages of 2,870 men and women, and "Generosity was defined as “the virtue of giving good things to one’s spouse freely and abundantly” — like simply making them coffee in the morning — and researchers quizzed men and women on how often they behaved generously toward their partners. How often did they express affection? How willing were they to forgive? The responses went right to the core of their unions. Men and women with the highest scores on the generosity scale were far more likely to report that they were “very happy” in their marriages. The benefits of generosity were particularly pronounced among couples with children. Among the parents who posted above-average scores for marital generosity, about 50 percent reported being “very happy” together. Among those with lower generosity scores, only about 14 percent claimed to be “very happy."
Marriage can be happy and absorbing if we cultivate our garden of love. Absorbing love, unswerving loyalty need not be complex. Sharing and connecting can be simple. Meet after work and walk and talk a couple of miles in the shopping areas followed by more conversation over a meal. Some couples run or exercise together. Some couples study the Bible together. Talk and find some ways that are enjoyable for both spouses to fellowship frequently that is fun and fosters faithfulness.
Mastering the impulse to do nothing in a relationship makes us irresistible; trying shows caring.
4) Increasingly become immovable in Christ. Stubborn can be bad or good. Being immovable in Christ is not bad stubbornness but a committed, continual surrendering of sins like selfishness and ungodly fear to change what needs to be changed. Our consistent change into Christ-likeness is irresistible. If we are cooperating with God, the person we were when we first met God, will evolve into someone more like Christ.
While we will not be perfect in this earthly life, we can be thankful for where we have come from, were we are at and where we are going. Thanksgiving is irresistible. It's wonderful to be wanted and willing to improve. Contentment is not static.
5) Think, talk and act in compassionate truth. Living in the truth requires courage. A survey found that 80 percent of Americans believe that sex outside of marriage is wrong. Yet another study by the U.S. Centers for Disease Control found that about 85 percent of women and 91 percent of men have engaged in premarital sex.
Often when we contradict our value system, the body reacts with actual physical and/or emotional pain. Some get headaches, others nausea, some a bad stomach. Some succumb to various addictions. Some experience the slipping away of self-esteem. Some experience some other type of harm.
Our bodies are interconnected. When we do good and when we sin, it affects spirit, intellect, emotions and physical body.
We are also interconnected with other people. "Dime con quien andas y te dire quien eres." (Tell me with whom you associate, and I'll tell you who you are.")
Unified belief and behavior is irresistible. Many hate hypocrisy. Also not many admire marriages that last fewer than 12 months, but many do admire long-term unions like the nearly 30 year marriage of Hollywood celebrities and Christians Denzel and Pauletta Washington.
6) Stop allowing negative stuff to stick to you. All our sins have been forgiven. God wiped the slate clean, so we can wipe it clean too. Colossians 2:13-15 New Living Translation Bible says, "You were dead because of your sins and because your sinful nature was not yet cut away. Then God made you alive with Christ, for he forgave all our sins. He canceled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to the cross. In this way, he disarmed the spiritual rulers and authorities. He shamed them publicly by his victory over them on the cross."
To meditate on what's wrong with you or bad circumstances is foolish nonsense that will fail to endear us to others. Constant complaining is irritating and enables the decline and even destruction of relationships. Proverbs 17:9 Amplified Bible says, " He who covers and forgives an offense seeks love, but he who repeats or harps on a matter separates even close friends."
When bad things happen cooperate with God to get over them quickly and to learn how not to go there again!
Unflappable is irresistible. Living in self-pity and/or getting stuck in situations God had empowered you to get out off sucks the life out of relationships.
7) Celebrate special events symbolizing love while recognizing they are not the substance of love. Weddings are wonderful, but the real wonder is a long-term, loving marriage. When scanning magazines available at mainstream news stands, magazines dedicated to weddings far outweigh those dedicated to marriage. Our culture often does not conform to Christ.
Also God made each person unique. Why do we tend to try to make everyone the same? Red and black are among my favorite colors. I remember sharing that I would consider a wedding dress in these colors. That really set off some peoples alarms!
Maybe I should have been born Chinese? Red (hong) is the color of fire. Red symbolizes success, happiness and good luck. Red is the color of celebration at birthdays and weddings. Black (hei) is the color of water. It symbolized heaven.
Celebrate the symbols while concentrating on the substance. Many of us want to be married, but studies show many are not willing to carefully select marriage partners, do the work to be an ideal partner and continuously nurture and grow our marriages. Approximately 75 percent of us marry once. Twenty percent marry twice, and five percent will marry three or more times. Also many people do not wait at least three years after their divorce to heal from the dissolution of their marriage before entering another relationship in a state of brokenness.
Keep hope alive. Just because we have never been married or divorced once, twice or more times does not mean that God doesn't have a good marriage in mind for us. Nelson Mandela married his sweetheart and third wife, Graca Machel, on his 80th birthday.
A lot goes into a marriage. One thing that seems to vanish over time is compliments. Sincere, specific compliments shared throughout the day are irresistible. Tell your wife that you delight in the moles sprinkled on her cheeks, neck and breasts; the peaks and valleys of her curves; the marvelous way she fends off sibling rivalry; the superior way she keeps money from seeping out of the household budget; or whatever things are special and specific to your spouse. The more you appreciate her uniqueness, the more aroused she gets; the more she shares sublime sex with you. Husbands love compliments too that appreciate their qualities of character and accomplishment. Many men are plagued by insecurities. The biggest erogenous zone is the mind.
When we aren't saying things that build up our spouse, we are tearing down our marriage. Few people want to have sex with a spouse who does not woo them with wonderful words and ways. A sexless marriage is often a loveless marriage outside the bedroom.
8) Be open-minded to novel ways of living the truth. God desires us to be easily pliable to His touch changing whatever needs to be changed or even eliminated. This means that we may be trying a lot of things before we find the right fit. Continual self-improvement is irresistible.
Christian and Chinese American Cookie Lee was disappointed that her mom's 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. employment caused her to miss a lot of events in Lee's childhood. Lee wanted to be in the workforce and still have plentiful time together as a family. So for seven years before she had children she turned a hobby into a one-woman, part-time jewelry-making business while working a full-time job. After seven years she was making enough in her business to quit her daytime job. To have a family that she could spend plenty of time with while growing her business, she hired sales consultants to start their own businesses under her's.
Some good, Bible-study questions to ask are: "How does this relate to my reality?" "Are my beliefs really in agreement with the Bible?"
Lee did a lot of prayer, research and asking questions to make her dream of being there for her family a lot work out while prospering in her jewelry-making business.
Some are against women in jobs, businesses and/or ministries and try to put guilt trips on women so engaged. However, in the Bible Priscilla was a tent maker and had a church in her home with her husband, Aquila. Lydia was a business woman selling fabrics dyed in purple. Rachel was a shepherdess. Deborah was a prophetess and judge. Esther was a queen.
God placed some novel things in you that He designed to be developed for the good and enjoyment of yourself and others. God is for pleasure. David says about God is Psalm 16:11 Amplified Bible, "You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy, at Your right hand there are pleasures forevermore."
The novel inspires people to pursue us. John, the husband of Cookie Lee, pursued her by joining her business creating more time together and more money.
9) Excel in helping and pleasing people within Biblical boundaries. Those who do the minimum hurt people. Believers are extravagant lovers.
An African chief invited the men of his tribe to a feast. The chief provided all the food and asked that the men of the tribe bring a jug of wine. One man of the tribe named Ali wanted to go, but he didn't have wine. His wife suggested that he buy the wine noting that it wasn't expensive. Ali responded, "How foolish to spend money when there is a way to go free! It won't hurt to add one jug of water to the pot of wine." When the day of the feast arrived Ali and the other men of the tribe poured his jug into a large pot. After all the guests arrived the chief commanded the servants to fill everyone's glass. Suddenly a cry arose from the crowd lamenting the taste of water instead of wine. Not only Ali but others too had decided to do the minimum by bringing water instead of wine.
Becoming absorbed in a clean, creatively decorated house and abandoning cuddling and creative entertainment with our spouse is a way some wives do the minimum. Some husbands do the minimum by thinking, talking and acting out the attitude, "My job is number one in my life."
10) Live more for we than me. We want others to make sacrifices that show they want us.
In the Bollywood film Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara Imran is a character who found out a year ago the father who raised him is not his biological father. As a part of a bachelor, road trip with two friends through Spain, Imran decides to visit his biological father. While smoking a cigarette his biological father, Salman, explains that he abandoned Imran and his mother before Imran's birth because at age 25 he did not want the responsibility of fatherhood; his soul was and still is only fed by his art and world traveling. Salman thinks that me is better than we, but even he has to cover up his pain through a nicotine addiction. God didn't create us for selfishness. He created us to serve.
Irresistible people find ways to weave together responsibilities and dreams.
Greek Australian Christine Caine was active in Christian singles ministry. Many told her that marriage and kids would slow her down. However, she and her husband, Nick and daughters, Sophia and Catherine, travel the globe sharing Jesus Christ with others and have ministries, like Equip and Empower, that help others plant churches and fight human trafficking among other things. The devil is a liar: marriage and family are fun and fulfilling, not boring and/or oppresive.
Sometimes people embrace the lies of the devil due to ignorance and inconsideration. John Tillotson, a Christian leader of the 1600s, said, “Ignorance and inconsideration are the two great causes of the ruin of mankind.” Avoid ignorance and inconsideration by cooperating with God to learn how to solve problems by incorporating people with passion, and then doing it.
Sonya Lyubomirsky, a professor of psychology at the University of California, Riverside, told Jane E. Brody for the artice "That Loving Feeling Takes a Lot of Work" in the New York Times newspaper on January 14, 2013, that she encourages each marriage partner to ask himself or herself each morning, “What can I do for five minutes today to make my partner’s life better?”
Making we more important than me nurtures marital love and sex. Enjoy marital sex; it's holy and righteous! We is designed to be wonderfully irresistible. It's spiritual and logical that a popular sexual position is called the "missionary." If you are married, try a twist on the missionary where the husband kneels and straddles his wife's leg while she’s lying on her left side. From here, she should bend her right leg around the right side of his waist—allowing full access to her vagina, her clitoris, her other body parts and the possibility of one or more orgasms.
In what ways are you irresistible? Please leave an irresistible on-line comment at the bottom of this article.
1) Be a people magnet. It doesn't matter if we are an introvert or an extrovert. Irresistible people connect with other people cultivating the God in believers and introducing Him to others.
We usually first learn to be people magnets by being parented by people magnets. Mother Teresa said, "Try to put in the hearts of your children a love for home. Make them long to be with their families. So much sin could be avoided if our people really loved their homes."
Love is not natural. Christ in us gives us the strength to make the choices to love hour by hour and day by day. He teaches us to cultivate an inner life focused on finding detailed and varied ways to please God and people.
God designed for children to come out of the love of God and spouse. A marriage to God the Father, God the Son Jesus Christ and God the Holy Ghost and to each other produced the Palmer siblings, one of whom is named Keke. African American Keke Palmer, who starred in the movie Akeelah and the Bee, says that her parents introduced her to God and helped her to form a good relationship with God that extended to loving herself and other people.
Pampering ourselves, our marriage, family and friendships with time and attention need not be about spoiling people but rather serving everyone to be their best and to live their best possible life.
Spending little time and attention on our relationships guarantees disconnection and if not corrected often leads to dissolution.
2) Cultivate confidence in Christ in all areas of life. Emotional and other types of instability and insecurity are areas where our understanding and belief in God are weak. Sometimes we may feel, "I'm not loveable;" "I'm unworthy;" and other soul destroying ways. Our feelings are often a product of our self-talk or in response to the way someone is treating us.
God loves us and forgives us of all our sins and all the sins of others. No Biblical reason exists not to love ourselves and other people. When we feel unlovable, unworthy or some other unappreciative way, it's because of sin. Talk to God about it. Get it straightened out. Problems don't go away on their own. They have to be dealt with.
If we are not receiving the love of God, then where love hasn't reached, it cannot be given out. We are designed by God to give out love in overflowing abundance. Jesus Christ says in John 13:34-35 the Message Bible, "Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other."
God wants us to be clear about loving Him, ourselves and others. Ephesians 5:17 Amplified Bible says, "Therefore do not be vague and thoughtless and foolish, but understanding and firmly grasping what the will of the Lord is." Vague people do not live in victory. They are not using time effectively. "El vago trabaja doble." ("The vague works double.")
The vague are susceptible to soaking in the beliefs and attitudes of others instead of being wielded by God to sway others with the love and goodness of God. The vague are nothing like Viktor Frankl. Adolph Hitler's Gestapo arrested this 26-year-old Jewish psychiatrist in Vienna, Austria, and forced him into a concentration camp. Month in and month out without the end in sight, Frankly worked under the huge smokestacks that belched out black carbon monoxide from the incinerators where his father, mother, sister and wife had been cremated. Each day Frankl hoped for a few slivers of carrots or peas in the daily bowl of soup. Nevertheless, the extreme Eastern European cold couldn't stop Frankl from getting up an hour earlier than usual to wrap his feet and legs in scrap burlap and wire to protect them from frostbite. When Frankl was called for inquisition, he stood naked in the center of a white light while men in shiny boots hour after hour assailed him with questions and accusations trying to break him down with every accusing lie they could think of. Already they had taken his wife, his family, his writing, his clothes, his wedding ring and everything else of material value. But in the midst of this barrage of questions, God flashed an idea across Frankl's mind: "They have taken from me everything I have--except the power to choose my own attitude."
As believers not even the Gestapo should be able to persuade us to adopt evil attitudes because we have a powerful resource living on the inside. 1 John 4:4 Amplified Bible says, "Little children, you are of God [you belong to Him] and have [already] defeated and overcome them [the agents of the antichrist], because He Who lives in you is greater (mightier) than he who is in the world."
3) Refuse to be a slave to impulses. Conduct a careful, orderly, thoughtful way of life that examines impulses against the teachings in the Bible and chooses that which is in line with the Word.
Leaning on God is not passivity. God conquered the chaos and created the Garden of Eden. Believers are conquerors like God. We make small choices all throughout the day, day after day, that will eventually produce positive, purposeful plants of truth and other things that are good or weeds of wickedness. Few infidelities start one day out of the blue. Most infidelities are the creeping vines of complacency that overgrew a previously cultivated garden of love.
Some experience infidelity as anticipation and exhilaration from the secrecy, the forbidden sex, the idea that someone really gets us and is willing and eager to fulfill our fantasies. Meanwhile all the potency of sexuality and other sensuality was available in the marriage if we had aggressively and consistently cultivated the time and attention necessary to have a strong, sublime marriage. To know someone and to be known by someone deeply is a spiritual, mental and physical endeavor that does not happen by accident and without a great deal of prayer and practice. When we say, "I do," it doesn't mean, "I'm done working on making sure our relationship stays well watered and wonderful."
Some of the simplest things start great relationships and help them to keep going well. George Foreman, a Christian minister, husband, father of 10 children, African American, entrepreneur and championship boxer, says, in his sermon "The Power of a Smile," "All of us can get up out of that bed every day and make this world a better place by just smiling . . . . We all can be nice."
Mary Landis and Judson Landis write in their book Building a Successful Marriage, "The most important characteristic of a marriageable person is the habit of happiness." Researchers from the University of Virginia’s National Marriage Project recently released the latest “State of Our Unions” report. The December 11, 2012, issue of The New York Times Magazine says the National Marriage Project examined the role of generosity in the marriages of 2,870 men and women, and "Generosity was defined as “the virtue of giving good things to one’s spouse freely and abundantly” — like simply making them coffee in the morning — and researchers quizzed men and women on how often they behaved generously toward their partners. How often did they express affection? How willing were they to forgive? The responses went right to the core of their unions. Men and women with the highest scores on the generosity scale were far more likely to report that they were “very happy” in their marriages. The benefits of generosity were particularly pronounced among couples with children. Among the parents who posted above-average scores for marital generosity, about 50 percent reported being “very happy” together. Among those with lower generosity scores, only about 14 percent claimed to be “very happy."
Marriage can be happy and absorbing if we cultivate our garden of love. Absorbing love, unswerving loyalty need not be complex. Sharing and connecting can be simple. Meet after work and walk and talk a couple of miles in the shopping areas followed by more conversation over a meal. Some couples run or exercise together. Some couples study the Bible together. Talk and find some ways that are enjoyable for both spouses to fellowship frequently that is fun and fosters faithfulness.
Mastering the impulse to do nothing in a relationship makes us irresistible; trying shows caring.
4) Increasingly become immovable in Christ. Stubborn can be bad or good. Being immovable in Christ is not bad stubbornness but a committed, continual surrendering of sins like selfishness and ungodly fear to change what needs to be changed. Our consistent change into Christ-likeness is irresistible. If we are cooperating with God, the person we were when we first met God, will evolve into someone more like Christ.
While we will not be perfect in this earthly life, we can be thankful for where we have come from, were we are at and where we are going. Thanksgiving is irresistible. It's wonderful to be wanted and willing to improve. Contentment is not static.
5) Think, talk and act in compassionate truth. Living in the truth requires courage. A survey found that 80 percent of Americans believe that sex outside of marriage is wrong. Yet another study by the U.S. Centers for Disease Control found that about 85 percent of women and 91 percent of men have engaged in premarital sex.
Often when we contradict our value system, the body reacts with actual physical and/or emotional pain. Some get headaches, others nausea, some a bad stomach. Some succumb to various addictions. Some experience the slipping away of self-esteem. Some experience some other type of harm.
Our bodies are interconnected. When we do good and when we sin, it affects spirit, intellect, emotions and physical body.
We are also interconnected with other people. "Dime con quien andas y te dire quien eres." (Tell me with whom you associate, and I'll tell you who you are.")
Unified belief and behavior is irresistible. Many hate hypocrisy. Also not many admire marriages that last fewer than 12 months, but many do admire long-term unions like the nearly 30 year marriage of Hollywood celebrities and Christians Denzel and Pauletta Washington.
6) Stop allowing negative stuff to stick to you. All our sins have been forgiven. God wiped the slate clean, so we can wipe it clean too. Colossians 2:13-15 New Living Translation Bible says, "You were dead because of your sins and because your sinful nature was not yet cut away. Then God made you alive with Christ, for he forgave all our sins. He canceled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to the cross. In this way, he disarmed the spiritual rulers and authorities. He shamed them publicly by his victory over them on the cross."
To meditate on what's wrong with you or bad circumstances is foolish nonsense that will fail to endear us to others. Constant complaining is irritating and enables the decline and even destruction of relationships. Proverbs 17:9 Amplified Bible says, " He who covers and forgives an offense seeks love, but he who repeats or harps on a matter separates even close friends."
When bad things happen cooperate with God to get over them quickly and to learn how not to go there again!
Unflappable is irresistible. Living in self-pity and/or getting stuck in situations God had empowered you to get out off sucks the life out of relationships.
7) Celebrate special events symbolizing love while recognizing they are not the substance of love. Weddings are wonderful, but the real wonder is a long-term, loving marriage. When scanning magazines available at mainstream news stands, magazines dedicated to weddings far outweigh those dedicated to marriage. Our culture often does not conform to Christ.
Also God made each person unique. Why do we tend to try to make everyone the same? Red and black are among my favorite colors. I remember sharing that I would consider a wedding dress in these colors. That really set off some peoples alarms!
Maybe I should have been born Chinese? Red (hong) is the color of fire. Red symbolizes success, happiness and good luck. Red is the color of celebration at birthdays and weddings. Black (hei) is the color of water. It symbolized heaven.
Celebrate the symbols while concentrating on the substance. Many of us want to be married, but studies show many are not willing to carefully select marriage partners, do the work to be an ideal partner and continuously nurture and grow our marriages. Approximately 75 percent of us marry once. Twenty percent marry twice, and five percent will marry three or more times. Also many people do not wait at least three years after their divorce to heal from the dissolution of their marriage before entering another relationship in a state of brokenness.
Keep hope alive. Just because we have never been married or divorced once, twice or more times does not mean that God doesn't have a good marriage in mind for us. Nelson Mandela married his sweetheart and third wife, Graca Machel, on his 80th birthday.
A lot goes into a marriage. One thing that seems to vanish over time is compliments. Sincere, specific compliments shared throughout the day are irresistible. Tell your wife that you delight in the moles sprinkled on her cheeks, neck and breasts; the peaks and valleys of her curves; the marvelous way she fends off sibling rivalry; the superior way she keeps money from seeping out of the household budget; or whatever things are special and specific to your spouse. The more you appreciate her uniqueness, the more aroused she gets; the more she shares sublime sex with you. Husbands love compliments too that appreciate their qualities of character and accomplishment. Many men are plagued by insecurities. The biggest erogenous zone is the mind.
When we aren't saying things that build up our spouse, we are tearing down our marriage. Few people want to have sex with a spouse who does not woo them with wonderful words and ways. A sexless marriage is often a loveless marriage outside the bedroom.
8) Be open-minded to novel ways of living the truth. God desires us to be easily pliable to His touch changing whatever needs to be changed or even eliminated. This means that we may be trying a lot of things before we find the right fit. Continual self-improvement is irresistible.
Christian and Chinese American Cookie Lee was disappointed that her mom's 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. employment caused her to miss a lot of events in Lee's childhood. Lee wanted to be in the workforce and still have plentiful time together as a family. So for seven years before she had children she turned a hobby into a one-woman, part-time jewelry-making business while working a full-time job. After seven years she was making enough in her business to quit her daytime job. To have a family that she could spend plenty of time with while growing her business, she hired sales consultants to start their own businesses under her's.
Some good, Bible-study questions to ask are: "How does this relate to my reality?" "Are my beliefs really in agreement with the Bible?"
Lee did a lot of prayer, research and asking questions to make her dream of being there for her family a lot work out while prospering in her jewelry-making business.
Some are against women in jobs, businesses and/or ministries and try to put guilt trips on women so engaged. However, in the Bible Priscilla was a tent maker and had a church in her home with her husband, Aquila. Lydia was a business woman selling fabrics dyed in purple. Rachel was a shepherdess. Deborah was a prophetess and judge. Esther was a queen.
God placed some novel things in you that He designed to be developed for the good and enjoyment of yourself and others. God is for pleasure. David says about God is Psalm 16:11 Amplified Bible, "You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy, at Your right hand there are pleasures forevermore."
The novel inspires people to pursue us. John, the husband of Cookie Lee, pursued her by joining her business creating more time together and more money.
9) Excel in helping and pleasing people within Biblical boundaries. Those who do the minimum hurt people. Believers are extravagant lovers.
An African chief invited the men of his tribe to a feast. The chief provided all the food and asked that the men of the tribe bring a jug of wine. One man of the tribe named Ali wanted to go, but he didn't have wine. His wife suggested that he buy the wine noting that it wasn't expensive. Ali responded, "How foolish to spend money when there is a way to go free! It won't hurt to add one jug of water to the pot of wine." When the day of the feast arrived Ali and the other men of the tribe poured his jug into a large pot. After all the guests arrived the chief commanded the servants to fill everyone's glass. Suddenly a cry arose from the crowd lamenting the taste of water instead of wine. Not only Ali but others too had decided to do the minimum by bringing water instead of wine.
Becoming absorbed in a clean, creatively decorated house and abandoning cuddling and creative entertainment with our spouse is a way some wives do the minimum. Some husbands do the minimum by thinking, talking and acting out the attitude, "My job is number one in my life."
10) Live more for we than me. We want others to make sacrifices that show they want us.
In the Bollywood film Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara Imran is a character who found out a year ago the father who raised him is not his biological father. As a part of a bachelor, road trip with two friends through Spain, Imran decides to visit his biological father. While smoking a cigarette his biological father, Salman, explains that he abandoned Imran and his mother before Imran's birth because at age 25 he did not want the responsibility of fatherhood; his soul was and still is only fed by his art and world traveling. Salman thinks that me is better than we, but even he has to cover up his pain through a nicotine addiction. God didn't create us for selfishness. He created us to serve.
Irresistible people find ways to weave together responsibilities and dreams.
Greek Australian Christine Caine was active in Christian singles ministry. Many told her that marriage and kids would slow her down. However, she and her husband, Nick and daughters, Sophia and Catherine, travel the globe sharing Jesus Christ with others and have ministries, like Equip and Empower, that help others plant churches and fight human trafficking among other things. The devil is a liar: marriage and family are fun and fulfilling, not boring and/or oppresive.
Sometimes people embrace the lies of the devil due to ignorance and inconsideration. John Tillotson, a Christian leader of the 1600s, said, “Ignorance and inconsideration are the two great causes of the ruin of mankind.” Avoid ignorance and inconsideration by cooperating with God to learn how to solve problems by incorporating people with passion, and then doing it.
Sonya Lyubomirsky, a professor of psychology at the University of California, Riverside, told Jane E. Brody for the artice "That Loving Feeling Takes a Lot of Work" in the New York Times newspaper on January 14, 2013, that she encourages each marriage partner to ask himself or herself each morning, “What can I do for five minutes today to make my partner’s life better?”
Making we more important than me nurtures marital love and sex. Enjoy marital sex; it's holy and righteous! We is designed to be wonderfully irresistible. It's spiritual and logical that a popular sexual position is called the "missionary." If you are married, try a twist on the missionary where the husband kneels and straddles his wife's leg while she’s lying on her left side. From here, she should bend her right leg around the right side of his waist—allowing full access to her vagina, her clitoris, her other body parts and the possibility of one or more orgasms.
In what ways are you irresistible? Please leave an irresistible on-line comment at the bottom of this article.
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
How to Stop Spinning Out of Control
Sometimes we are in relationships with believers and certain interactions repeatedly spin out of control. Neither one of us wanted to end up in sins of anger, envy, selfishness, etc., but we seem to repeatedly move there. Often these interactions condition us to have a mindset of fear regarding how we will behave in certain circumstances. Fearing the worst behavior or something less than the best behavior is not believing the best. God calls us to the best. 1 Corinthians 13:7 Amplified Bible says, "Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening]."
As believers, "Esperamos." Our hope and confidence is not in someone's ability to change to good behavior, but in God's ability to change someone. As long as our hope and confidence is in people we will be prone to expect failure, and we will try to flee and/or fight as a means of protecting ourselves from sin. Placing our confidence in God and walking in love is not operating with unrealistic thoughts about human behavior. Rather love sees and understands the truth about ourselves and others and turns us over to God for the ability to do good in increasing likeness of God.
Examine ourselves. Ask questions like, "What behavior am I afraid he/she will do?;" "Why do I respond in fear?" Then ask God to set us free from the fearful thought pattern that is motivating us to respond in an unloving way. Ungodly fear entangles us in more sin because wisdom declines and low expectations increase.
God has already placed Himself in believers giving us self-control to master the fear and to respond in love.
When we are walking in self-control we are in God's will. We don't have a perfect body yet, so we will not walk in perfect self-control. A Japanese proverb says, "Fall down seven times, get up eight times."
God is already aware of and taken care of all the sins we ever did, are doing and will do. When we are imperfect, but chasing God, God is willing to make the changes we ask Him. 1 John 3:22-23 Amplified Bible says, "And we receive from Him whatever we ask, because we [watchfully] obey His orders [observe His suggestions and injunctions, follow His plan for us] and [habitually] practice what is pleasing to Him. And this is His order (His command, His injunction): that we should believe in (put our faith and trust in and adhere to and rely on) the name of His Son Jesus Christ (the Messiah), and that we should love one another, just as He has commanded us."
Contact Michele Jackson and Rafael Fowler at email address michefrancesjackson@gmail.com to join our live relationship group to conquer fear and to live in love and self control among other things. God created us and preserves our life from fertilization through birth, youth, old age and beyond death for people who are African, European, Asian, Hispanic, male, female, working all different kinds of assignments at all different kinds of hours and with different minds and abilities and with multiple mixtures of these characteristics. God created us to have a good relationship with Him and to be in relationships with people who are just right for us.
As believers, "Esperamos." Our hope and confidence is not in someone's ability to change to good behavior, but in God's ability to change someone. As long as our hope and confidence is in people we will be prone to expect failure, and we will try to flee and/or fight as a means of protecting ourselves from sin. Placing our confidence in God and walking in love is not operating with unrealistic thoughts about human behavior. Rather love sees and understands the truth about ourselves and others and turns us over to God for the ability to do good in increasing likeness of God.
Examine ourselves. Ask questions like, "What behavior am I afraid he/she will do?;" "Why do I respond in fear?" Then ask God to set us free from the fearful thought pattern that is motivating us to respond in an unloving way. Ungodly fear entangles us in more sin because wisdom declines and low expectations increase.
God has already placed Himself in believers giving us self-control to master the fear and to respond in love.
When we are walking in self-control we are in God's will. We don't have a perfect body yet, so we will not walk in perfect self-control. A Japanese proverb says, "Fall down seven times, get up eight times."
God is already aware of and taken care of all the sins we ever did, are doing and will do. When we are imperfect, but chasing God, God is willing to make the changes we ask Him. 1 John 3:22-23 Amplified Bible says, "And we receive from Him whatever we ask, because we [watchfully] obey His orders [observe His suggestions and injunctions, follow His plan for us] and [habitually] practice what is pleasing to Him. And this is His order (His command, His injunction): that we should believe in (put our faith and trust in and adhere to and rely on) the name of His Son Jesus Christ (the Messiah), and that we should love one another, just as He has commanded us."
Contact Michele Jackson and Rafael Fowler at email address michefrancesjackson@gmail.com to join our live relationship group to conquer fear and to live in love and self control among other things. God created us and preserves our life from fertilization through birth, youth, old age and beyond death for people who are African, European, Asian, Hispanic, male, female, working all different kinds of assignments at all different kinds of hours and with different minds and abilities and with multiple mixtures of these characteristics. God created us to have a good relationship with Him and to be in relationships with people who are just right for us.
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